A Guitar-Shredding, Dinosaur-Killing Martial Arts Master: The Friday Nooner (EST)!

Awesome Video Of The Day Our #1 Commenter (Is A Douchebag) Over the course of the last few months, the Cracked Blog has received a whole bunch of comments. Some of them have been insightful, some have been marginally coherent, and a good number of them have been spam for some site called sugarmommy.com. Through thick and thin, though, through everything that has come to pass, there has been one man, a dedicated commenter who has made it all worth it. I'm talking, of course, about Nick. A veritable geyser of useful information, Nick has always been there for us when we needed him most. Luckily, it turns out that Nick is an expert on pretty much every single topic that has come up! In the past few months, I've had the unique pleasure of reading Nick's thoughts on:
Continue Reading Below

Advertisement

  • Atheism Vs. Religion
  • Computer Programming
  • Martial Arts
  • Humor
  • Why Guitar Hero Is Stupid
  • I have to admit it: I was skeptical at first. I thought to myself, "How can this kid possibly be an expert on all these topics?" I scoffed when he said that people who play Guitar Hero are wasting their lives away, but do you know what Nick does instead of playing it? HE PLAYS A REAL GUITAR. That's right - Nick can play this song from Final Fantasy, and guess what? HE'S NEVER EVEN PLAYED THE GAME. Say what you will, but you know what? That's really impressive. Impressive enough that when he gives me
    Continue Reading Below

    Advertisement

    Continue Reading Below

    Advertisement

    very specific instructions on how to kill a Tyrannosaurus Rex, I'm willing to listen. And when he tells me all about how awesome his computer is, I'm going to go out and buy a computer just like it. That's because - unlike a lot of people that might think he's totally full of s**t - I understand that Nick is an expert on all things. And while I'll never be as learned on nearly as many subjects as Nick, I'd like to close this post with a humble achievement of my own: I'm no math expert, but I think I've finally solved the age-old "Internet + Anonymity = ???" problem: Thanks, Nick - I couldn't have done it with you.
    To turn on reply notifications, click here

    30 Comments

    Load Comments

    More Blogs

    4 Crazy Ways The Human Body's Changing In Our Own Lifetimes

    Our bodies are changing.

    121

    5 Celebrities With Arguably More Interesting Parents

    Many of today's celebrities have some real surprises in their family trees.

    80

    5 Meltdowns That Went Viral Before The Internet Existed

    Everybody loves a good old-fashioned meltdown.

    86

    5 Iconic Movies Saved By Last-Minute Changes

    Some of your favorite movie moments were added months after everyone went home.

    109

    5 'Romantic Triangle' Characters We Just Feel Sorry For

    Fictional love triangles are always a rigged game.

    150

    5 Actors Who Keep Playing Weirdly Specific Roles

    They say the definition of insanity is doing the same thing again and again and expecting a different result.

    84