Nothing survives the apocalypse except for Jean-Claude Van Damme DVD boxes. All future communication and society would be based on the plotlines of his movies. That's the only, but valid, reason I invented this system to quickly categorize a JCVD plotline. All his plots fall into one of five funegories.
Revenge over a lost loved one drives Jean-Claude Van Damme into karate-filled circumstances.
On the run from the law, military or mafia, Van Damme flees to karate-filled circumstances.
Jean-Claude Van Damme is unwillingly involved in karate-filled circumstances by a second Jean-Claude Van Damme.
This movie is a rehashing of a different movie, only now it stars Jean-Claude Van Damme.
If the filmâs plot is described by E, this simply indicates that it is profoundly insane.
Jean-Claude Van Damme as
... Ben Archer, a bouncer who kicks ass first and talks never.
Ben Archer's wife works for INS, and after finding a container filled with Chinese immigrants, she brings one home with her. Now, what she doesn't know is that this is the daughter of international criminal Sun Quan, played by Simon Yam (Naked Killer 2
). You might not recognize that movie because it was also distributed with the title
, and then again as Raped by an Angel
. Then finally as just Super Rape
. In the film industry, starring in a movie called three different kinds of rape is what's called "a triple threat."
Sometimes people in movies can do crazy things like train oil drillers to be astronauts or decide child custody cases through arm wrestling contests, and it's okay because movies are stupid. But in Wake of Death
, the Super Rape
of American cinema, there are realistic consequences to things as stupid as an immigration officer stealing an alien from her office. Within 30 minutes, Sun Quan kills Jean-Claude's wife. You know what that means, Sun Quan. Killing Jean-Claude's wife was your first mistake; not wearing a cup was your LAST mistake.