Hey, so y'know, every once in a while I need to switch it up and do an episode that's a little different. This is one of those episodes. Not a true HBN in my opinion, but, personally, I like it for what it is. And once again, I have to thank my wonderful neighbors, the Archers, for supplying their progeny for my efforts. Now on to other things. Some of you have asked me about my upcoming indefinite sabbatical from Cracked. Am I really leaving? Yes. Will I ever return? Maybe. Where can you see me next? Well for those of you looking for more Gladstone, you should buy the book The Ultimate Game Guide To Your Life.Â And while you're at it you should also buy Man vs. Weather: Be Your Own Weatherman.Â Now it's true that the first book was actually written by Chris Monks, and the latter was written by Dennis DiClaudio, but here's the thing: I'm mentioned in the acknowledgements of both books! Isn't that awesome? So if you buy them you can like totally see my name in print. (And oh, while you're at it, buy Oh, The Humanity by Jason Roeder. No, that bastard didn't acknowledge me at all, but he has written for Cracked and was one of us bloggers for literally like a day. So yeah, what the hell.)
Forget 'morale-boosters,' we'd rather have the money.
Trends among women trigger a level of contempt that's way beyond what is deserved.
Buckle up. This article is gonna be wild.