Let's just move on for now. Meanwhile, because America wants to know, here's an update in People I May or May Not Have Sex With if They Ask Me. If you'll recall from last week, as a result of Tina Fey's comments in Reader's Digest that may or may not have called out Jon Stewart, I very publicly vowed that I would no longer have sex with Tina, even if she asked me. Even if she begged me. Even if she showed up at my apartment wearing nothing but a towel and those sexy, sexy glasses, even if she showed up with a whole box of Cheez-its, I would not change my mind. I am a man of principles, Tina. And as glorious and majestic as I think our filthy union would undoubtedly be, a man of principles does not simple abandon those principles as if they were a child. A man of principles stands
Forget 'morale-boosters,' we'd rather have the money.
Trends among women trigger a level of contempt that's way beyond what is deserved.
These stories remind us what unlimited wealth and power can do to a human being.
Can we rest?