The Original: You Shall Not Covet
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Both God and I still really liked this one. Our natural inclination to want what our friends and peers have lies at the root of a lot of the unhappiness in the world. Theft and busty neighbor seduction, obviously, but also more subtle things, like needless purchases and the hollowness of our consumer culture.
The Updated Version: Having More Will Not Make You Happy, And Also Stop Staring At Women When They're Jogging.
The only real problem with the original is that not many people know what "covet" means, so we got rid of that. Also, apparently God has gotten into some trouble in the past staring at women in the park, so we added that in here too.
Markus Schieder/iStock/Getty Images
What a beautiful, multifaceted deity we have.
Chris Bucholz is a Cracked columnist and has met lots of great people in the mountains. His first novel, Severance, is incredible and available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, or Apex Books. Join him on Facebook or Twitter.
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