The T-Shirts Technique
Nothing that you could ever say will be as effective at conveying a message as a T-Shirt. Ever. That is a law. If you wanted to convince someone that your opponent was an idiot, you can write as many speeches as you want, come up with a bunch of catchy slogans, hell, even show up with actual hard evidence of your opponent behaving like an idiot and I guarantee you that it won't resonate with the American people quite as much as a shirt that says "Jerkoff" that features an arrow pointing to your opponent. Anything that you want to say, put it on a t-shirt. Thank me later. Now, I understand that, in modern elections, it is considered "uncouth" to wear t-shirts to a debate. In effort to be super couth, I would recommend you just find some hot chicks and get them to wear whatever T-shirts you had in mind. I'm lucky, these two girls follow me everywhere I go.
I'm telling you from experience, you get a couple of hot girls walking around with your face on their t-shirts and your s**t will get done. The Bullshit Technique
Make at least one outlandish claim in the course of this debate, but act very certain of it. Really, go ahead and throw out just one statistic, quote or theory that is complete and utter bullshit. Obviously, the outlandish claim needs to either support your campaign or tarnish the campaign of your opponent, but that's not all this technique accomplishes; it also sets a brilliant trap. When you say something new and absurd, you're practically