Frosty the Snowman Declares War on The War on Christmas

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Buck Rogers and Flash Gordon have shown us that whenever there's a ridiculous war in the future, a brave hero from Earth's present travels there to win it. I thought that I could apply this scientific process to help win a ridiculous war raging today: the War on Christmas. So I pulled Frosty the Snowman from the past and put him on the front lines. His brave adventures begin immediately after double Hitler, a terrifying side effect of my time violations. Hitler Hitler:

MERRY CHRISTMAS, BUT GET KIDS! OVER IT. AND NOTICE I SAID CHRISTMAS. CHRISTIANS HAVE THAT'S BECAUISE THIS WHOLE THE BEST HOLIDAY. IF THAT CELEBRATION
SO WAIT. DICKS ARE HIS TOOTHPASTE? I GOT I, DUDE. SURE I COULD. WATCH: PHIL COLLINS WALKS INTO AN AIRPORT AND THEY SAY, yOU CAN'T BRING TOOTHPASTE IN
so I'S AN -PURPOSE GREETING TO INCLUDE EVERY POSSIBLE CULTURE? IN 1969 CALLED THAT FINGERING. WE CALL IT THE WAR ON CHRISTMAS. SIR. OH. SURE. NOTHI
I'M JUST BEING IF HE WANTED TO SENSITIVE TO THE LESS MOCK YOu, HE'D ASK you FORTUNATE! IF THERE WERE ANY VEGAN OPTIONS AT YOUR WINTER PARTY. SURE. WIL
Frosty the Snowman Declares War on The War on Christmas
WHAT ARE you GLYS PLAYING? HL. KIDS! HERE'S A SNEAK PEAK AT THE ALL-NEW RUDOLPH ADVENTURES! REINDEER GAMES. REINDEER GAMES? WITHOUIT WEARING A CONDOM?
WE NOW RETURN TO THE SHOW!
SANTA PEOPLE ARE MODIFYING YOUR HOLIDAY TO ACCOMODATE SOME NOTION QE ROLITICAL CORRECTNLE so WHAT? TRADITIONS CHANGE. WHEN I FIRST STARTED THIS, ISNLI
Frosty the Snowman Declares War on The War on Christmas
I'VE WASTED MY LIFE WITH THIS P.C. BULLSHIT. SNOWMAN. NOW? yoU GET THAT LITTLE GIRL THE HELL OLT OF HERE. NEED TO BE AROUND CHILDREN FOR MY WORK-- T C

Seanbaby invented being funny on the internet. Check out more from him at Seanbaby.com and follow him on Twitter.

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