The Show CSI: Magic Kingdom follows Mick, the Magic Kingdom's toughest but most tortured criminologist as he solves crimes that usually involve brutal violence and an aggressive amount of semen. Follow Mick as he tracks down rapists and does mostly nothing else with his time. Sample Scenes
SCENE 1 EXT. THE DOCKS BEHIND THE MAGIC KINGDOM- DAY MINNIE, taking photographs of the crime scene, is the image of professionalism, her and that big ole' ass of hers. There are several corpses strewn about, all male, all liberally glazed with WHAT IS PROBABLY SEMEN. MINNIE deftly sidesteps a corpse as MICK approaches, a cigarette dangling from his mouth.
It's about time. We've got 10 bodies here and-
Hold it, Min- I haven't even had my first cup of coffee yet.
Better take it to go, Mick. This looks bad.
I can see that. Or should I say, I can see... [Removes sunglasses]... men?ROCK AND ROLL
SCENE 17 INT. DONALD DUCK'S STUDIO APARTMENT - NIGHT DONNIE has been drinking- No surprises there. The floor is littered with bottles. In fact, the only thing in the apartment that isn't a half-empty bottle of booze is a broken picture of Daisy Duck, which DONNIE clutches. MICK walks in.
Looks like you've seen better days, Donnie.
[Unintelligible gibberish.] [Unintelligible gibberish.]
I hear you, old friend. I hear you.
[Unintelligible gibberish.] [The "N" word] [Unintelligible gibberish.]
You may have a point. But, Donnie, listen to me. We found him. The guy who killed Daisy... we found him.
That's right. He slipped up and accidentally masturbated all over Pluto's dog house. When we tested the semen, we found it was a perfect match for the stuff found on Daisy.
[Unintelligible gibberish.] Semen, [Unintelligible gibberish.]
I'm not sure that's totally necessary. I took him down with my pistol already, because he pulled a gun on Minnie.
That's right. [Removes Sunglasses] Looks like this pervert's load isn't the only thing that was... shot.ROCK AND ROLL
SCENE 58 INT. INSIDE THE 'IT'S A SMALL WORLD' RIDE - NIGHT Goofy is just knee-deep in semen, like, you can't even believe there's so much, where did it even come from?
DOB: "Because it couldn't have come from just one man, right? Because there's so much of it and no one man can hold that much semen, I looked it up. So you gotta figure there's, like, a sadistic group of organized rapists working together with nothing but time. And, like, a whole mess of semen. And Goofy's all-" Iger: I can read Daniel. DOB: Really? Huh. You said you didn't like it, so I just assumed it was because, instead of eyes, your sockets were full of two, eye-shaped puss- Iger: I didn't like it because it was bad. It was repetitive, vulgar, obsessed with semen-
November 6, 2009 [Ring.] DOB: Hello? [Faint sound of heart exploding.]
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