something about it.
Have you ever been fucked violently in the ear? And then your friend comes in and, instead of helping, starts telling you what the guy's balls look like? That's you. You're that friend.
I want you to protect me from getting fucked, and all you're saying is "Balls, balls balls."
"Looks like the left one's a little bit lower than the right, what do you think, Diane?"
"Oh, you're right! And it look, they were recently shaved. I bet that razor burn hurts."
"I bet you're right, Diane."
One more shot. Okay, I'll head on over to FoxNews. They've got
to be trustworthy. They've got "News" right there in the title, so to suggest seriousness, and "Fox," so to suggest cleverness. Or perhaps that you can't trust them around chickens.
Hey, FoxNews.com has clips of Sean Hannity's interview with Sarah Palin. Sean says that it's an uncensored interview, with
no questions off limits!
Palin has been fairly reluctant to speak, and FoxNews offers a no-holds-barred interview? The Bloodsport
of interviews? Hot damn, we're cooking with gas!
Let's see, on the subject of what's to be done about the Economy, Sarah Palin says "We've gotta cure this. By reform." Now, moving on to-
Wait. No. That can't
be enough of an answer. That's way too obvious. Our current system led to the giant retarded Wall Street implosion, so of course
the answer is reform. I mean, after the economic week we've had, if you asked me
what I think we should do, with my absolutely nonexistent background in economics, all I'd be able to say would be "Hey, you know our old plan that ended up turning into a shit sandwich? Let's not keep doing that." Are you saying that's enough to satisfy you, Hannity? Can I
be Vice President?
Who would say reform isn't the answer? I mean, when there's a problem, you fix it by doing things differently. Is anyone actually running on a platform of "These current practices are pretty clearly flawed and poisonous to America...but I'm gonna stick with them and see how this all plays out." No. Why is "By reform" a satisfactory answer for the question of how to heal the economy? That's the tip- No, that's not even the tip of the iceberg, that's the
of the iceberg. That's iceberg as a concept. Why are you okay with that, Sean Hannity?
Ooh, do you know what other questions Hannity asks in this rare, no-topics-are-off-limits interview with the hitherto unknown woman who may well become our Vice President? Also on the topic of the current state of the economy, Hannity asks "Is what Barack Obama doing dangerous for America?"
That is the poison disguised as a question that he asked in this shitstorm disguised as an interview.
"Getting the nod was an experience?" Boy, that's some hard-hitting motherfucking shit, right there.
You can ask her anything. You're wearing a suit. You clearly think
you're some kind of journalist. You've got a responsibility, Hannity, and all you're doing is a) lobbing softballs and b) letting your obvious bias show in an unfair, twisted question that no one else
would even consider asking. No one, and now you've put the idea in people's heads.
Come on, Media. We're coming off some rough years as far as trust in our government goes. As a country, we're paying closer attention than ever. Do your job.
Tell me something useful.
I've already heard that Obama and Palin are both fairly inexperienced. And I've heard that McCain doesn't know how to use the internet. I've heard all the "pig in lipstick" and "I can see Russia from here" lines, because they've been repeatedly jammed down my throat over and over and over again. How could I miss them?
I don't need to hear again about who was a Community Organizer, and who thinks that "Community Organizer" is a laughable position. I'm not concerned with how many houses someone has. I donât need to be told that someone is a terrific speaker. I don't care how anyone feels about hockey, and I don't need to hear about what Priests a candidate may or may not have hung around at some point for some amount of time.
And if I hear "Hey, the bottom line is, she sold the plane
" one more fucking time
, I'm going to track down that plane, buy the shit
out of it, and crash it directly into the White House, regardless of who's living there. Test me on this.
I feel like all we're getting are lies and lines, and no one's talking about the issues and no one's holding anyone accountable. Media, you're supposed to be on our side. Stop repeating the same sound bites over and over again. In the history of forever, has a President's ability to do his job been enhanced or impaired as a result of how they feel about moose-hunting? Then shut up about it.
I mean, is Adam McKay
right? Is the media completely dead
? Subquestion, why the shit am I getting the most honest and insightful political information from Adam McKay?
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