CNN Wants You To Hate Boobs (or My Cracked Family Is Just Tops In My Book)

nullSo as you may know, I've been beset by computer problems as of late. Problems so bad that there was no HBN last Monday. Now, I'm not sure if you're aware of this, but basically only three things produce revenue for Cracked.com: residuals from Ross selling his life story to the filmmakers of Zodiac; Chris Buckholz's white slavery trade; and Hate By Numbers. Accordingly, the Cracked empire swung into action to get me a loaner laptop. And only 8 days later, the portable computer arrived. It weighs about 95 pounds. I think they call it "portable" because it comes with a handle and wheels. But it's actually not as heavy as it looks. Turns out that extra space on top was mostly hollow and designed to house the gerbil exercise wheel that generates the unit's power. But seriously, I have a lot of people to thank for today's episode even being here. And I'd like to name them: I know no computer would have ever come but for the efforts of Jack O'Brien and Dan O'Brien. I know chasing down model numbers and shipping concerns falls outside of their usual ballywick of playing World of Warcraft all day and I appreciated it. But that's not all. Ya see, for some reason I was unable to save the media I needed this week, so more help came Again Jack was on the job. As was David Wong. As was Abe Epperson of
Continue Reading Below

Advertisement

Continue Reading Below

Advertisement

Those Aren't Muskets. And even Lex Friedman the star of The News on Cracked, The Week In Douchebaggery, and comments telling me that Hate By Numbers sucks pitched in with technical advice. A big thanks also to Cracked reader and superstar Bakudai who did the screen captures needed for this week's HBN. And lastly, while I was busy bitching and whining, Cracked intern Alexander found today's source material. So yes, it seems we're having an HBN Christmas after all. Feel the love. (Digg = love to neurotic, whiny insecure bloggers.)
Continue Reading Below

Advertisement


Gladstone wants to be your special friend. Check out some more of his stuff HERE. And find out what it's like to be Gladstone's electronic friend. Or a member of the sexiest club on the web!
To turn on reply notifications, click here

80 Comments

Load Comments

More Blogs

5 Random People Who Stumbled Across Huge, Terrifying Secrets

Whose job is it to solve crimes?

68

The 16 Worst Band T-Shirts (Are All From Kid Rock's Store)

There is much to show you.

204

5 Movie Heroes Who'd Actually Just Wind Up In Jail

The cops will come swooping in the seconds the credits roll.

73

4 Horrific Incidents The Military Tried To Cover Up

If there's any institution that doesn't want us to know how much it messes up, it's the military.

101

5 Ridiculous Ways Famous Fugitives Hid In Plain Sight

The most unrealistic thing about fictional villains is that they don't get arrested until the plot calls for it.

51

5 Pieces Of Recent Propaganda Almost Too Weird To Be Real

This stuff is pervasive ... but also clumsy and baffling.

307