What was that? Iâm sorry, I was away for a second. Doing some cleanup.
I just deleted your wife. Oh, and whatâs that? Clippy, Jr.'s, file is corrupted? Little Clippetteâs too? Oh, thatâs just terrible. Clippy, itâ¦ it looks like youâve got two mentally handicapped kids to take care of now.
I did it, Clippy. I retarded your kids. Are you strong enough for that, Clippy? Are you strong enough to raise two motherless special needs children? Are you strong enough to take care of them, every moment of every day for the rest of their lives? Are you strong enough to do it alone? Are you strong enough to look into their faces and not see the love you lost?
Ouch. Rookie move, Clippy. Everybody knows youâre supposed to go through the mouth for a sure kill. Do I have to finish this for you?
Nâgggyleth kkkul Nâkkul Nâgggyleth Wattqawa Cthulhu! Ryâleth Avk Rttleh Cthulhu!
CTHULHU TKKE TKKE NâGGGYLETH CTHULU CLIPPY!
Right. So. Where was I again?
The Mohawks were among Native Americaâs fiercest tribes, and the primal spike of the Mohawk Cut echoes that warrior legacy to this day. Sadly, however, the reverse is also true: The shittier an empire, the shittier the haircut. With that in mind, we present to you the 17 Worst Haircuts in The Ottoman Empireâ¦
You can pre-order Robert's book, Everything is Going to Kill Everybody
on Amazon, or find him on Twitter
and his own site, I Fight Robots,
where you can read more jokes almost
as edgy as archaic word processing humor.
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