Mr. Duchovny, It has recently come to my attention (as well as the attention of everyone else) that you are in rehab for Sex Addiction. First off, let me say congratulations; that's super great. Probably the best addiction to have behind heroin. I mean, they die young and look pretty haggard, but you know those guys are happy like most of the time. I imagine it's much the same with a sex addiction, especially for someone who can get sex so readily. Is rehab just a big 24-hour orgy, or what? Because thatâs all I hear from Lohan. Again, congrats. But the reason I'm writing is that, as you are probably aware, your character in Californication also suffers from a sex addiction. Quite a coincidence. I hope Iâm not jumping the gun when I assume that after this whole rehab thing dies down, youâll probably become a paranormal investigator. And when you doâ¦please, Mr. Duchovny, let me be your Scully.
This should have resulted in years of therapy.
Sometimes it's just a matter of making the US Department of Defense look, like, REALLY cool.
Actual impending doom like global climate change or mass extinction just makes people bored.