If you did not get that reference, there are more valuable things you can be doing with your time.*** Wank boosted Tony up through the freshly broken window of the science lab, then scuttled up the wall with Tonyâs assistance. They landed in the dark, and something crunched beneath their feet. âI cannot believe you broke the window,â Tony sighed. âCouldnât be avoided," Wank replied curtly, stumbling towards the doorway. âOK, but did you have to hurl my iPhone through it?â âWhat else would you suggest?â âThere are rocks literally everywhere. They are the very foundation of the Earth beneath our feet.â âHuh. That
Rocks: Nature's locksmith.It took an hour and a half to navigate the roughly 100-feet between the science lab and the cafeteria, including 15 minutes spent walking in circles until Tony and Wank simultaneously realized that they were both following the other; 30 minutes of backtracking to find the bathrooms before simply urinating through the slots of Jenny Speceâs locker (it was unanimously decided on as retribution for her terrible handjob techniques; itâs like stroking a beloved pet,
Three hundred pounds of pre-sliced potato mana; the starchy ambrosia; yellow gold.âIâm going to make all of them,â Wank whispered in awe. He rushed over and began alternately praying to, swearing at and punching the fryer. After what seemed like a frankly unnecessary flying elbow, he finally managed to hit the "ON" button. The machine kicked to life. âDude, just use the manual,â Tony offered the booklet helpfully. Wank promptly seized it and dropped it into the deep fryer, âRecords are for the weak of mind and demented! We are young and clever; we will not suffer instructions!â âI cannot conceive of a situation in which losing the instructions for an intensely complicated and dangerous piece of machinery has ever ended well.â âWell clearly it's working: They have become deep fried and delicious. Now you may dine on your precious instructions.â Tony could not shake an ominous feeling of foreshadowing, but he ate the manual anyway because he was extremely high and that is just what extremely high people do.