1954 was a different time. Civil Rights were just a quaint idea, communists were gearing up to steal everyone's precious bodily fluids, and you couldn't go on the radio and tell a girl you wanted to give her the Christmas gift of your dick without getting slapped with some sort of fine. But one man -- nay, one hero -- named Jimmy Butler found a way around that.
It starts innocently enough. Maybe "Baby, I wanna trim your beautiful Christmas tree" is meant literally, even though Butler does sound like he's singing while trying to hide his erection. He starts begging for the honors and says that his "work is pleasing," but maybe he's just a real go-getter. Then he declares that he's going to "bring along my hatchet, my beautiful Christmas balls," and everyone listening says in unison, "Ooh, he's talking about his junk." Just to make it perfectly clear, he voices his intention to "sprinkle his snow on your tree," but only with the goal to "make you cheery," because he is generous and sensitive when it comes to Christmas bukkake.
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He once gave a tree a beautiful pearl necklace.
Butler then insists that he's way better at trimming trees than that other guy who wants to trim your tree, and while he's not one to spread rumors, he couldn't help but overhear that this other schlub gets way too excited and quickly throws all of his tinsel on one branch without even paying attention to what would make the tree look good. In fact, Butler claims to be the best tree-trimmer in the world, a title all men aspire to. So go on, let Butler trim your tree. What's the worst someone who refers to his penis as a sharp object could do?