A Danish Town Says Pork Must Be Served At Public Institutions
Everybody loves bacon, right? Even vegetarians like bacon. So how cool is it that a town in Denmark decided that it was a requirement to serve pork at all public functions? This is why those Scandinavian countries are always coming out on top in happiness surveys! Because they have amazing programs like this. Denmark: Where they made it illegal not to serve bacon! We can all get on board with that.
The Sad Truth
You know who doesn't eat bacon, or any pork at all? Muslims. Yeah, it turns out that this was all an attempt by very conservative anti-immigrant parties to make sure refugees from the Middle East felt just that little bit more unwanted.
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Terrorists! Even their shirts have atom bombs on them!
The town of Randers was reacting to a 2013 decision by many nursery schools to drop pork from their menus. This probably just made it easier to feed all the kids the same thing, since if some can't eat pork, then why make it? But it caused a huge uproar, with politicians all the way up to the prime minister weighing in, concerned that poor innocent children were being indoctrinated, and that Danish food was going to disappear from the face of the Earth (famous Danish dishes like ... um ... you know the one). I'm not sure how not eating pork at school would suddenly convert a bunch of four-year-olds to become Muslims, but these are the sort of things that happen when you involve the magic of bacon.
Lenny Kravitz Was Accused Of Illegal Dentistry In The Bahamas
I'd believe a lot of things about music legend Lenny Kravitz. If you told me he was arrested for being too sexy, I would buy it. That he kept a secret harem of 100 women? Sure. That the queen of England once fainted at one of his concerts? Well, she's only human.
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What do you expect to happen when you start flashing your dong everywhere?
But performing illegal dentistry? Has the musician had a serious midlife crisis and suddenly decided to change jobs? Did he go on vacation, get a little drunk, and start trying to pull teeth out of the mouths of random passersby?
The Sad Truth
Kravitz actually lives in the Bahamas, and is constantly doing charity work there. This time, he had flown in four dentists from the U.S. and made them available at no cost to locals who normally couldn't afford dental work. Obviously, this is a great thing for him to do. Unfortunately, he didn't get the right permits, and some dickwad squealed to the police. So on the fourth day of the clinic, the cops raided his makeshift surgery center while patients were having procedures done. One person was getting dentures, and another was in the middle of a friggin' root canal when the dentists were told they had 15 minutes to pack up their stuff and get out. Keep that in mind next time you're in the midst of an awful dental procedure: You might be paying for the pleasure, but at least you don't have to worry your dentist will stop halfway through and get put on a plane back to the United States.
Kathy wrote a very funny book called Funerals To Die For , and you can buy it here. Or follow her on Facebook, Tumblr, Instagram, and Twitter.
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