5

Thomas Boulton And Frederick Park Embraced Their Sexuality

telegraph.co.uk

When you think of gay icons and Victorian England, the one name that probably comes to mind is Oscar Wilde. But he was far from the only man or woman pushing the boundaries of what the law and mainstream society considered acceptable when it came to sexuality.

Enter Thomas Boulton and Frederick Park. Or, rather, Fanny and Stella.

thesundaytimes.co.uk
You'd never guess they weren't straight.

4

Sarah Wakeman Became Lyons Wakeman

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3

Tom Sayers Kicked Everyone's Ass

loc.gov

Tom Sayers was born poor and received no formal education, which meant his job prospects were limited, even back in the 1800s. After working as a bricklayer for a little while, he decided to see if punching people in the face wouldn't pay more money. He became part of the (then-illegal) sport of boxing.

It turned out that Tom was really great at hitting people repeatedly. Despite being just 5-foot-8 and less than 150 pounds, he was England's boxing champion for 11 years, losing only one fight out of 16. There were no official weight classes at that point, so he almost always fought men a lot bigger than he was. And this was back before gloves were introduced, so these fights were always bare-knuckle bouts.

wikipedia.org
No gloves allowed, but top hat and tails were required.

After beating the toughest British opponents, in 1859 he accepted a challenge from the American champion, John Heenan. In spite of the fact that boxing was illegal, it was also hugely popular, especially with the upper-class, and thousands of people turned out for the fight, including the Prince of Wales, Charles Dickens, and the prime minister, Lord Palmerston.

Sayers held his own for two and a half hours, or 42 rounds, even though the sun was in his eyes, Heenan was 6-foot-2 and 195 pounds, and at some point during the fight he actually broke his arm. The referee had to call it a draw when the spectators stormed the ring. Both the fighters had sustained serious injuries, and it was that fight that led to the Marquess of Queensberry rules, meaning boxing was finally an organized sport.

telegraph.co.uk
This is what happened to Heenan's face. Thank God Amir Khan's is protected.

2

Daniel Sickles Was Completely Bonkers

Every age has an eccentric, and the craziest person of the Victorian era may have been Daniel Sickles.

His first mistake was probably marrying a girl less than half his age. Teresa Bagioli was 15 and Daniel was 33 when they got hitched in 1852. Neither of their families were happy about it, and they may have been on to something, because the two didn't seem to like each other much. They certainly didn't stay faithful to each other. Daniel left his pregnant wife at home while he went to London with a prostitute, whom he presented to Queen Victoria herself. He didn't like the door swinging both ways, though. When he found out Teresa was having an affair he shot her lover dead right across from the White House.

While the chillest man in the capital watched.

The trial was a media sensation because the victim was the son of Francis Scott Key, Daniel was a congressman, and he was the first person in America to plead temporary insanity. The defense painted the deceased to be such a horndog that one newspaper actually thanked Daniel for "saving all the ladies of Washington from this rogue." The jury must have felt the same way, because he was acquitted.

During the Civil War, Daniel fought bravely and managed to work his way up to general. Then came the Battle of Gettysburg, when Daniel violated orders and as a result got hundreds of people killed and almost lost the battle for the Union. Karma got him back, though, when a cannonball shattered his leg. It needed to be removed, and instead of tossing it in the trash like a normal person, Daniel boxed it up and sent it to a medical museum. After that he would visit his limb every year on the anniversary of the amputation.

Meanwhile, the leg didn't even get him a card.

1

Andrew Carnegie Was A Rags-To-Riches Superman

Andrew Carnegie, the steel baron you probably vaguely remember from your high school history class, was born in a one-room cottage in Scotland. When he was 13, he and his impoverished parents moved to America. It was there, through endless work and insider-trading and generally screwing people over, that he started to earn basically all the money.

Aidon/DigitalVision/Getty Images
There was so much that he had to find some creative uses for it.

Because the Victorians hated childhood, Andrew worked throughout his teenage years, starting as a bobbin boy at a cotton mill at 13, then moving to a telegraph office, and finally joining a railway company. It was there that he started earning serious money and also first showed his aptitude for badassery. It was 1861, and the Civil War had just broken out. The young Andrew managed to keep the Union's railroads and telegraph lines running basically single-handedly. He also managed to avoid any actual fighting by buying his way out of it, which might seem cowardly but is decidedly American.

Once the war was over, he bought the first of the steel plants that would make him the richest man in the world. Since his whole life had been devoted to work and saving the Union and money, he didn't manage to get married until he was 51. As rich old men in Victorian times were no different than rich old men today, he married a 30-year-old trophy wife.

wikipedia.org
To his credit, he didn't trade her in for a new model when she got older.

But it was his philanthropy that really makes Andrew the supreme badass. In 1889 he wrote a book telling other rich people that they had a responsibility to use their wealth to help society. And he didn't just throw that out there and see what happened; he led by example. He started giving away millions, mostly to help build libraries, but also to various universities, scientific endeavors, and the arts. By the end of his life, he had given away 90 percent of his fortune, or $13.7 billion in today's money. And what did he get for it? A dinosaur, a cactus, and two towns named after him. He served as the inspiration for Scrooge McDuck. And, most importantly, he got to be #1 in a Cracked article.

Read about the crazy Victorian obsession with photographing dead people in Kathy's very funny book FUNERALS TO DIE FOR. And follow her on Facebook, Tumblr, and Twitter.