Sorry, Southern Comfort fans, there's only one reasonable choice when it comes to deciding what to imbibe at the day job. That, obviously, is vodka. While it's a total myth that vodka has no scent, it is far and away the easiest scent to conceal. See, all alcohol smells like alcohol. The only difference with vodka (or gin, but yuck) is that it doesn't smell like alcohol and oak barrels or alcohol and hobo piss (that means you, Steel Reserve).
The champagne of hobo piss.
Sure, you can't down an entire fifth of vodka on the bus to work in the morning and expect people to ignore the fact that you're breathing fire at 9 a.m. But if we're just talking a couple of drinks, you won't find a much easier crime to conceal than cubicle boozing with vodka.
Do you have a recommendation as to what particular vodka brand works best in a professional setting? Did the voice that just asked that question in my head sound exactly like a better and stronger version of me? The answer to both of those questions is "yes."
Mostly, I recommend buying what you can afford. That said, there's a huge difference between cheap vodka and expensive vodka. The main difference being that the latter is distilled several times to be as smooth as possible and the former is probably just filtered through the mesh covering that's used to keep body hair from going down the drain of the bathtub of the Russian housewife (the anti-Communist propaganda kind, not the mail order bride kind) who brewed it up. In other words, the cheaper the vodka, the more impurities it will have, and that could very well mean a little bit stronger of a smell. I'm not saying you have to be a dick and buy that vodka that P. Diddy makes, but shooting for something in the mid-level price range wouldn't be the worst idea. At the very least, buy Smirnoff.
But there's more to drinking at work than just buying the right vodka, isn't there? Yes, Me 2.0, there is. Let's talk about concealment.