You Can't Talk Someone Out of Being Offended
Also known as "Calm down, it's just a joke."
When I accidentally piss someone off, my knee-jerk reaction is to try to reason that pissed-offedness into not existing. And I'm not alone: The Penny Arcade guys did it with mockery, and one of your friends will do it tonight after they forget that "You Jewed me" hasn't been an OK thing to say for like 50 years, or ever. The problem is that this strategy doesn't make any more sense than trying to talk someone out of diarrhea.
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"Before your colon makes a decision, I have a PowerPoint presentation I'd like it to take into consideration."
Scientists call the feeling of being offended a narcissistic injury, and it's as uncontrollable as crying after you've had diarrhea in front of your first and last date with the woman you've secretly loved your whole life.
Trying to reason your way out of having pissed someone off is a natural urge, because it's rooted in trying to fix a mistake. No sane person wants to feel like they're the source of someone else's pain, so it's a means of shifting the blame off of ourselves. "I can't believe you turned my innocent joke into something dark and evil." We didn't mean anything cruel, so no one should be upset -- only there is no situation in the world where what we mean to do is more important than what we did. If the world really functioned like that, we all would've aced every test in high school (we meant to give the right answers, right?). Good intentions mean exactly dick if you're too incompetent to do anything with them. For example, I hear this was supposed to be a movie:
Oh, they sucker-punched ticket buyers! I get it now.