Anal probes are the kind of thing we like to pretend only exist in ridiculous alien abduction stories. We're most inclined to associate them with the shadier doings of the TSA, but that's not something they actually do. To put it simply, getting probed anally is not a common thing. Unfortunately, in some locales, that's a comfort the police are taking away from us.
Maybe it's because alien sightings are so frequent in the area, but this is especially true in New Mexico, where anal probing during routine traffic stops is reaching terrifying new levels. I mean, any anal probing during a traffic stop is pretty terrifying, but New Mexico really goes all out. Or all in, I suppose. That probably fits a little better in this situation.
Like a glove!
Cracked already covered the first anal probe horror story to come out of Heisenberg country a few days ago. Everyone has covered it, because it's goddamn crazy. It involves a man named David Eckert who was subjected to a colonoscopy, two rectal exams, and three enemas for no other crime than rolling through a stop sign while leaving a Walmart.
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Beware of falling prices and unwanted anal penetration.