That appeared in the New York Times, the New York Post, the Daily News, and New York Newsday. Trump paid $85,000 to publicly scream for the death of people he'd never met in relation to a matter he had no knowledge of. The crime had no link to Trump or his properties; he just felt like spending 160,000 modern dollars to publicly bay for the blood of children. Even if they had been guilty, that's insane. It would have been better for the world if he'd spent a day masturbating into wads of thousand-dollar bills. But he'd never do that because they don't bear his name, unlike this public demand for executions.
And it gets worse.
Trump defended himself by saying that he couldn't understand how police could get a false confession. He incarnates privilege. Law enforcement is the only reason he can demolish houses while there are homeless, the only reason we can have starving people and him on the same continent for longer than it takes to chew, and he doesn't even acknowledge that he's treated differently.
And it gets worse.
The Central Park Five weren't just innocent; they were super-innocent. The conviction was shattered by the real rapist's later confession and unimpeachable DNA evidence of his guilt. I want this on record: A convicted serial rapist and murderer did more to help these men than Donald Trump.
David Becker/Getty Images
Then again, most people do more than this living abscess.
That's still true. When the five were released from years of prison with every chance of a normal life stolen, did Trump offer them recompense for publicly calling for their deaths? He spent $85,000 demanding the death penalty. Did he offer a single cent for scholarships, compensation, employment, a word of regret, anything to help rebuild their ruined lives?
Over a decade after their innocence was proven at the cellular level, Trump implies that they must have been guilty of something. In his mind, non-white teenagers need an alibi to exist. Why would they be in the park? People don't have their shoes shined there! This is the point where even Trump felt like he'd gone too far and deleted the tweet. So you can stop tempting humanity, Satan, we've found our lowest point on our own. The toxic birther bullshit was nothing on this. That was only screaming for public proof of the birth of someone just because he wasn't white.
This should be mentioned every time he opens his mouth. This should be part of his biographical information. Entertainment listings should read "Tonight on Celebrity Apprentice: Donald Trump, 67, who once spent more than twice the average American salary to froth for the death of innocents and has never apologized, will continue with his bullshit fantasy of wisely advising people paid to pretend to listen."
Trump can't be real. He's an agent provocateur sent by aliens to make us riot against capitalism. But they've given up on us, and now he's controlled by an alien bitter about wasting its life on our idiotic species, doing the worst things it can think of just to see if we'll let him.
Luke has a website, tumbles, and responds to every single tweet.
Restore faith in your species with The Manliest Names in Use Right Now and The Video Game Guide to Grammar.
Learn even more about Trump with 10 Stories About How Terrible Trump Is or Trump's 4 Most Hilarious Attempts at a Good Idea, and Dan O' Brien defends his precious presidency against Donald Trump's Pretend Run at President.
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