The idea is that sports teams are named after something important in their community's history, but as Cracked Workshop Moderator and Researcher Evan V. Symon pointed out to me, they aren't that at all. The Toronto Raptors, for example, are so named because they held a contest around the time that Jurassic Park was popular, and everyone thought "raptors" sounded cool. The Anaheim Ducks are named after the Disney movies about a kids' hockey team and Emilio Estevez's dedication to douchebaggery. And the Washington Redskins are named after some fucking asshole who pretended to be a Native American to get attention.
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People have been arguing for decades in defense of naming a sports team after a racist turd-snorter. That's where these priorities are right now. Which should make it less surprising that ...