Everything is wrong, however, with what 13 Cleveland firefighters did from 2008 to 2010, setting up a scheme where they'd not only find other firefighters to cover their shifts for them but pay them to do so. One guy might pay another guy, say, $200 to cover eight hours of a 24-hour shift. And they weren't passing time by playing Arkham Asylum with one hand while polishing their hose with the other. Instead, they worked other jobs -- substitute teacher, construction, goat puncher -- while increasingly exhausted firescrubs covered for them at the station.
"Dammit, someone wake up Biff before he sleepwalks into the flames again."
Some of these side jobs were more lucrative than every real job your family's ever had combined -- one guy owned a construction company that regularly won big contracts with the city, and another made millions of dollars as one of the top real estate agents in the dadgum country -- in addition to the full salary and benefits unsuspecting taxpayers continued to gift them, like Santa catching dementia and spoiling everyone on the Naughty List.
So they made their money back real fast, and got credited like they were actually protecting Ohio from the flames of Hell, as opposed to quietly planning their getaway in case Satan ever decided to go Scorched Earth. One guy, working an hour for every two he sold, got credited with four training sessions he was too busy paving roads to attend. Another sub-taught while running a daycare, banking full arsonbuster pay despite working exactly one whole shift in two years. Buscemi wept.
And you do not want to piss off a man who's that good with an ax.