But, nope, that's an actual song, by an actual band called Trio. What's more, they recorded it in 1980, making it older than me. And it has not one, but two, music videos. The first is a fairly boring performance shot that never gets stranger than the drummer playing indoors but under an umbrella. The second is, well, more complicated. And murdery.
We open not with the band performing their song, but with the singer covertly showing us his mini keyboard like a flasher displaying his big ol' fleshsaber. Since nobody takes up his metaphorical dick duel, he lashes out by slapping a pretty waitress's ass. She promptly flips him off, and the bassist responds by chucking a knife into her back. This kills her instantly, despite it being a butter knife and thus duller than seeing Trio live.