Poop is pretty funny; we can all agree on that. It becomes far less funny, however, when your dog poops all over the place and you have to deal with it. Picking it up, throwing it away, training the flea-bitten varmint to not do that on the dinner table anymore -- it's all such a very big hassle.
Luckily, we've evolved to the point where we now have the Pootrap! I apologize in advance if I lose some of my readers here, but I'm going to be using some technical, industry language to describe what this intricate and fairly complicated piece of modern technology actually does:
It's a bag you wrap around your dog's asshole so they can shit in it.
That must just sound like some fancy, scientific mumbo jumbo to you, but I guess in Layman's terms, the Pootrap is a strap that you hook to your dog so a plastic bag hangs under the part of the dog where the poop comes out (it's usually toward the back). As it's walking around and doing its animal thing, it can pretty much shit whenever and wherever, and you don't have to do a damn thing. It's as easy as one, two- Oh shit, the dog ran away.
The marketing is pretty blatant, directly targeting dog owners who would rather deal with anything else than their own damn dog. Don't believe me? Their website all but admits it by emphasizing the many ways Pootrap makes your life easier, without one mention of how it makes the dog happy:
"No annoyance too minor, no excuse too lame."