... and I honestly don't think we can say the same for Bill. Even a former prosecutor has said that, after interviewing Cosby about the allegations, he thought Cosby was lying. Unfortunately, he didn't have enough physical evidence to bring him up on charges or arrest him.

But, before you take that last tidbit and run with it, deciding that alone means the man is not guilty, know two things:

1. Cosby settled that case out of court.

2. There is nothing to be gained from accusing someone of sexual assault.

No one has ever gotten famous from making unfounded rape allegations. If anyone did, it wasn't in a good way. Rape is a horrific and traumatic experience to recount, especially on such a public level. It's also pretty fucking rare that someone lies about it (according to the Justice Department, it only happens about 2 percent of the time), yet society thinks that just because some comedian didn't use swear words on stage and was an actor pretending to be the patriarch of a fictional family, he must be innocent. Because, clearly, famous people are never shitty human beings.

Wikipedia

Even if we apply the statistics that only about 2 percent of people ever lie about sexual assault, that still means that odds are Cosby STILL did these things to 33 of the 34 women who are accusing him. The likelihood of one person using his money and influence to get away with whatever the fuck he wants is a lot higher than 34 random women conspiring to "take down" said man decades later, especially when that person has proven to always have been an entitled asshole and has admittedly had extramarital affairs that he paid money for to keep from public records.

Recap:

The gang has a friend that bullies everyone whenever Fat Albert isn't around (because Albert will sit on him or something). Eventually, Fat Albert confronts him, and the bully promises to stop.

The Moral of the Story:

As misfortune would have it, not all bullies are fictional animations. Sometimes, they're super rich sitcom stars from the '80s. Even though Fat Albert was anti-bullying, Cosby himself has always been one, and not just when it comes to his interactions with journos who are trying to do their job. Back in 1989, Cosby was speaking to a group of black college graduates and decided to use the moment to humiliate All-American tackle Dean Brown by implying that his 2.5 GPA meant he had a mental disorder.

deadspin.com

He also admitted he had his lawyers threaten a lawsuit against The National Enquirer when they caught wind of a rape story the tabloid was set to run, strong-arming them into running a puff piece in its place. The reason was so it wouldn't help the 2005 charges that he had assaulted a former Temple University employee. Even his own biographer characterized him as a bully.

The comedy community is very tight-knit, so when all of them begin to call out one of their own, it is usually with good reason. Case in point: Carlos Mencia. This generation of comedians have been putting it out there for a while that Cosby is a shitbag. Tina Fey and Amy Poehler (who are my goddamn idols) called him out on Saturday Night Live's Weekend Update in 2005 when that Cosby allegation made the news.

Then, in 2008, 30 Rock also took a shot at Cosby, this time with Tracy Morgan yelling at not-Cosby for what he did to his aunt in 1976.

Wikipedia

The gloves really came off once Hannibal Buress mentioned the rapey elephant in the room when he called Cosby out on his shit during a show in Philly, and someone posted it to YouTube.

Since then, a number of comedians have opened up to hearing about one of the worst-kept secrets in comedy. But, Cosby keeps on keepin' on, refusing to address the rumors or show any tact by making rape jokes in his acts. Look, I have a pretty dark sense of humor, and, for the most part, think almost nothing is off limits when it comes to joking about things. But, rape jokes are just never funny, especially when the person making them is accused of being a serial rapist.

It's not as if Cosby or his wife, Camille, haven't ever admitted he was a sex fiend. Camille confessed to my best friend Oprah that she knew about an affair of his back in the '70s. Coincidentally, that affair was with one of the people Scotti was in charge of sending monthly payments to for Cosby. So, there's a pretty good chance he wasn't being so much "philanthropic" as he was "covering his ass" with the rest of those payments.

On a side note, anyone else thoroughly creeped out that Cosby decided to make Cliff Huxtable an OB/GYN yet? Because I am.