So we're not even trying to bring back the days of the gladiators of old. Why would we? We live in the fucking future, so let's drag gladiators kicking and screaming into the modern age. What? No, I'm not talking about actually traveling across time and picking up a bestiarius or two to take on your neighbor's yapping dog, although I'm sure you'd like that, Steve. I'm talking about modernizing the equipment. Iron Man-style. Like so:
Robot Andy Dufresne found the Shawshank Redemption pose
is a lot more effective while holding twin axes.
Such is the ball an Australian up-and-coming fighting promotion known as UWM (Unified Weapons Master) is trying to get rolling. Their rules are simple: It's gladiatorial combat with ancient weapons, only this time everyone's wearing super-advanced, impact-resistant, carbon-fiber armor that enables them to go all out without covering the ring in entrails after two seconds.
Yes, of course the helmets have GoPros. I don't know why you even bothered asking.