I should say right up front that buying illegal drugs is, well ... illegal. Don't do it. Nothing you're going to read here amounts to me suggesting that you go out and explore the twists and turns of the drug trade for yourself. Quite the opposite, actually. As you'll eventually read, a decision like the one I made can lead to the most dire of consequences. Not the least among them being the risk of going to jail.
That said, avoiding jail is a thing I've had decent luck with recently. For example, during a recent traffic stop in Wisconsin, I was reminded that my license in that state was, in fact, suspended. That news combined with the fact that a tow truck had been summoned while I was awaiting my fate led me to the obvious conclusion that I was about to go to jail. Nope! The cop just had the tow truck take me to the Illinois border and let me go about my business, hundreds of dollars in traffic tickets poorer. That last part sucked, but holy shit, it beats getting arrested.
I've never felt more white!
That wasn't drug-related, obviously, but I also live in California. Thanks to weed being mostly legal, the closest I've come in recent years to getting in legal trouble for drugs was when a cop at a comedy festival lectured me for throwing a bunch of weed away when he spotted me rolling a joint. Turns out he was just going to tell me I couldn't smoke it on the boardwalk. He didn't even ask if I had a card.