I'm slightly less broke than I was the night that I killed Tim, but the wounds, they remain. I still go all Gollum-ey if I feel like my alcohol rations are being threatened. I even still get this weird second of hesitation whenever my wife asks me to buy her a drink. "Buy you a drink? But what if I starve later this evening?" Man evolved to be scared of snakes, and I evolved to keep a tight grip on my drinkin' money. So when I go out of my way to buy a round for someone that didn't ask for it, I feel like Santa and the Salvation Army all rolled into one medium black t-shirt. Merry Christmas. I've poured Bud Light into your stocking. And by stocking, I mean you.
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This present is full of whiskey. It's truly disgusting. I didn't plan this holiday out very well.
But here's the part that determines whether or not this is going to be a positive experience for me: When I do this, I have to make a concentrated effort to not keep a tally. If you decide to buy someone a drink because they wanted a drink and you were feeling kind, you're gonna take two steps back if you then make the mental note of "Alright, now THEY owe ME a drink." All of your efforts will be undone if you start playing a mental game of Bar Tab Math. And no matter who bought first, Bar Tab Math always leaves at least one person feeling bamboozled. You bought them a fancy cocktail and they bought you a draft beer? Sure, you wanted that draft beer, but what fucking gives?
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