Is Bella still in high school at this point? How did they afford such a nice house? Does Edward have a job? Doing what? Vampire stuff? Why would he let hard fucking ruin such a nice house? I don't understand anything. To distract me from all of my very reasonable questions, the movie makes Bella immediately pregnant.
![4 Twilight Movies According to Someone Who Hasn't Seen Them]()
We learn from a blond guy who isn't that first blond guy who we hate that the fetus isn't compatible with Bella's body, which, holy shit, why do kids like these books? The baby is apparently crushing Bella from the inside out, and Edward's really mad about this. Shirtless Guy is mad at Edward for making Bella pregnant, which seems unfair on Shirtless Guy's part, and also all of Shirtless Guy's wolf friends are mad, too, and they want to destroy Bella. For being pregnant, I guess. Is the stance of this movie that you shouldn't have sex even after you're married? This poor, boring girl is getting punished for finally having sex and she didn't even break a nice house while doing it.
Bella says, "You have to accept what is," and Edward says, "You've given me no choice," because screenwriting is whatever.
...
I swear I'm not trying to beat a dead horse, but let's consider the comic Spider-Man: Reign, a four-issue Spider-Man story set 30 years into the future (where Spider-Man is old and retired). In this very dark story, we learn that Mary Jane, the love of Peter's life, died as a result of having sex with Peter. MJ couldn't handle the radiation in Peter's ... fluids, so she died after sex-related complications. That death was meaningful, because it perfectly fits in with the essence of Peter Parker and one of the major themes of Spider-Man: guilt. Parker becomes Spider-Man because he feels guilty after his uncle's death, he pushes people away because he feels guilty after Gwen Stacy's death, and then he eventually accidentally kills Mary Jane and, of course, feels guilty after that. It's meaningful and important and perfect for the character.