In my current apartment, we have five mugs, no glasses, 10 plates, and a pink-handled cutlery pack from Family Dollar. This gives easy access to an excuse for what I call my "No Dish" rule. We simply don't have enough plates for me to waste! The less-flattering truth is that we could have a full set of fine china and I'd still be doing this shit.
Whenever anything comes in its own container, eat out of that. Anything can be a Cup O'Noodles if you just try hard enough and believe in yourself. Buy packs of mini-cereal boxes that you can pour milk into! Make one serving of pasta and eat it out of the pot! If you think about it, milk and juice are basically their own Capri Suns, as long as you have no shame and a lot of extra bodega straws.
If you order takeout, be sure to ask for extra containers and cutlery, then divvy up leftovers to store in the fridge in throwaway containers, each with their own plastic fork. If you really need a bowl for your Chef Boyardee or whatever, then heat it up over the stove in the can, and dump it in a bowl lined with Saran Wrap. Toss the plastic in the garbage when you're done and put your perfectly clean dish back on the shelf. Tell yourself that Gwyneth Paltrow would call this "hobo chic" and advertise it on her dumb website.
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Right next to coffee filters based on the ruffled collars of Queen Elizabeth I. Just $500.
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