But even if you don't accept that somewhat pessimistic logic, I think we can agree that the following three scenarios cover every situation where a man would complain about being friendzoned. And I hope that after reading you'll agree that in each scenario, the man in question would be completely wrong to raise such a complaint. Especially if you're a dude who likes to talk about the "friendzone" phenomenon. In fact, I think I'll just address such men directly from here on.
3
When You Become Her Friend Knowing You Want More
Let's start with the most common scenario for men complaining about being friendzoned (It doesn't matter if you don't believe it's the most popular, we're covering every scenario, so relax). You see a woman. You like her. You know you like her. Sure, some sexual attractions build over time, but this is not one of them. If she were to come right up to you and say, "Hey, I really like how you've memorized every line of dialogue in Arrested Development. Wanna be my boyfriend?" you'd say yes (Then you'd probably quote Michael Cera. Maybe a Cousins Les Dangerous joke. I'm not sure. I've never met you).
But instead of being transparent with your feelings, you come up with a plan: "Hey, I'll become her friend first. I'll show her what a great guy I am. I'll be her best friend and listen to her complain about boys and her friends and whatever else, and when she sees how sweet I am and what a good listener I am, she'll have no choice but to accept me when I finally confess what I knew from day one -- I dig her sexually and want to date her."
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I didn't consult my urban dictionary, but "dig her sexually" is still the hip term for wanting to bone that all the kids are using, right? Also, "bone," right?