"Tears began to slide down my cheeks. I had never been with a man, let alone a master of the skies."
Before I dove into the dinosaur erotica, I thought I'd see what Christie's approach was to a more traditional fantasy creature. There were more than a few stories about werewolves -- including one about a threesome with werewolf cousins -- but let's be honest here. I'm someone who has an Internet connection in a post-Twilight world. If I want to read about werewolf sex, there are options. Gryphons, however, were a new one for me, and I can only imagine that this was a true revelation for the person out there who couldn't decide if they wanted to get fucked by a bird or a lion. Finally, they no longer have to choose.
To be honest, though, it has a pretty slow start. Our protagonist in this story -- who doesn't even get a name -- is a young lady in a vaguely D&D-ish fantasy world who gets sold into slavery when her father's land is conquered by a rival noble who commands an army of gryphons. There's a pretty long sequence establishing her station in the feudal pecking order and how her job is to feed said gryphons, but when she actually goes to work, there's a new gryphon down in the stable and guess what he wants for lunch. Here's a hint: It's not food.
If you guessed "to put its penis into a human vagina," congratulations! You are correct!
marco testa/iStock/Getty Images
"I've had it with that asshole ordering off-menu."
Surprisingly, nonconsensual midair sex with a mythological eagle-lion isn't quite enough to get things done! Sims and Branwen throw in a little BDSM, too, just to make sure that nobody gets bored:
"Suddenly, stinging pain raked over my exposed skin. The gryphon struck me again, using its long tail to whip me. Each strike left a group of small red welts. I screamed, begging for more. I deserved to be punished; I was keeping the gryphon locked up. Why shouldn't it punish me?"
The gryphon also kills a couple of equally unnamed guards before allowing what's-her-name to climb on its back and fly off to her new life. This is a ... happy ending?
Christie Sims/Alara Branwen
"No, that cums later."