Look at it. It's a single cob of corn that someone already cooked. The label says "ready to eat" right on it. Like you're just going to walk around downtown with this cob in your mitt, chewing the kernels off like a latter-day squirrel-man, not a care in the world except for how you can get that sweet, sweet indigestible cellulose into your belly.
Who Buys This?
The utterly mad. I have no doubt that this is a perfectly legitimate cob of corn. I bet it is tasty and juicy and full of all that corny shit you corn-lovers can't get enough of. But why the fuck did you buy it from the cold case next to the knockoff Slurpee-machine at a ghetto 7-Eleven clone? No one needs corn on the road. Literally no one. In the history of mankind, none of the billions of souls that have existed would have had their day inconvenienced in any way by a lack of a corncob being available at a convenience store.
The fact this exists makes me think it's part of some diabolical plot by an otherworldly intelligence or demonic force that so loathes mankind it thought up the most innocuously asinine thing it could imagine just to prove to its overlords that we as a species are lazy and stupid enough to fall for any manner of half-assed cull. If they'll buy corn at a convenience store, they'll do any stupid thing. Let's just eliminate them all now.
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