Same goes for your shower curtain, which could be putting hair on your chest and muscle on your everything with each rinse:
And once you're swole as all get out, why not get a biker tank that shows it off as you boldly go?
Mondays, amirite? You've got a case of them, you need a tasty beverage, and BOOM you pick up the same dumb cup/thermos/flask you've always used. Isn't it time you drank life in with a new liquid receptacle? We think so, which is why we held a design contest for mugshot mugs, and you came up with ...
See, our Society6 store can put a design on just about anything. And this contest champ of an idea lovingly painted by Thomas Tan is our very first Mugshot Mug. Have a cup o' joe and be glad your job is your job and not the classroom bullshit you neglect while fleeing boulders thousands of miles away. And yet remember: It's not a crime to be interesting. If it were, they'd lock you up and throw away the key.
Your walls oughta be as classy and fun as you are, which is why our art prints can help:
Look at you go, you reader person. THIS WEEK ONLY enjoy free shipping from the Cracked Dispensary! Excludes framed prints, stretched canvas, rugs, and clocks. And be sure to order before Sunday, March 22, otherwise you'll have to give parcel handlers money. Like a fool.
You don't have to be some fancy (or whip-slinging) college professor to look good. Heck, you don't even have to wear a badassery-concealing bow tie. Just seek out a nice, comfy option from the thousands available on Society6. And in case you're seeking alternative options, we tracked down the best new designs from across the Internet, assembling this week's treasures in our Internet museum, for science, with the option to melt Nazis if used improperly.
Available at Threadless
Available at TShirt Laundry
Available at Naolito
Whose job is it to solve crimes?
The cops will come swooping in the seconds the credits roll.
The most unrealistic thing about fictional villains is that they don't get arrested until the plot calls for it.