After scouring the deepest darkest corners of the comedy world we’ve found even more gut-busting jokes and bits from your favorite comedians. So unhinge your jaw like some freaky anaconda and prepare to swallow these 15 new jokes for the Comedy Hall Of Fame

Patrice O’Neal

Patrice O'Neal

Comedy Central

"I don’t litter. I don’t throw garbage in the street. Not because I care about the Earth. But I’m afraid I’m going to be walking through the park drinking a soda and when I’m done, I just throw it over my shoulder, it’ll fly over a bush and land on some dead white woman’s head with my fingerprints on the can. Now I’m the Pepsi-Cola Killer because I’m lazy."

Mitch Hedberg

"The depressing thing about tennis is that no matter how much I play, I'll never be as good as a wall. I played a wall once. They're relentless."

Adam Sandler

Adam Sandler stand up

Netflix

“My name is Adam. My father’s name is Adam. Having the same name as your father, it’s alright until your voice changes. My friends would always call up, “Is Adam there?” My father would say, “This is Adam.” My friends would say, “Adam, you were so wasted last night.”

George Lopez

George Lopez

Netflix

“Just yesterday you were my little girl on a tricycle. Now you’re a young woman in a car, running over a little girl on a tricycle.” 

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