These Cool Deals Will Blow Your Friends' Minds

This piece was written by the Cracked Shop to tell you about products that are being sold there.

Sometimes you just want to show off. No judgments here! Cool stuff is cool, and it doesn't stop being cool just because you graduated middle school. In fact, we've rounded up a bunch of cool stuff purely because it's sweet and because it's all on sale. Check it out:

RokBlok: The World's Smallest Wireless Record Player V1.5

MSRP: $99

Sale Price: $89.99 (9% off)

Boomboxes are so '80s -- take it back even further. With a built-in speaker as well as Bluetooth capability, this Shark Tank favorite lets you play vinyl literally anywhere. The RokBlok fits in your pocket so you can take it out and set it up to play in seconds. That guy who bikes around town with a stupid Beats Pill won't know what hit him.

ElePod Magna Sound Bluetooth Speaker & MP3 Player

MSRP: $89.95

Sale Price: $39.99 (55% off)

What is this, an earpod for giants? Not technically, but they could probably use it as one. The ElePod Magna is 50 times bigger than an AirPod and has multi-functional speaker capabilities. There's even a built-in karaoke feature, if the novelty of a massive earpod somehow wears off.

LuguLake Vintage Phonograph Record Player

MSRP: $275.99

Sale Price: $249.99 (9% off)

Party like it's 1899 (but sounds like the 21st century) when you boot this baby up. It plays music via Bluetooth, USB, FM radio, or an AUX input with crystal-clear clarity thanks to the 10W tweeter, independent subwoofer, and two 20W full-range stereo speakers, but it won't look even a little out of place at your next murder mystery party. (Have you tried those? They rule.)

Mushroom Lamp & Charging Station

MSRP: $139

Sale Price: $111.99 (19% off)

This stylish lamp emits a warm glow while giving you a station that can charge up to five devices simultaneously and looking like something out of a steampunk Alice in Wonderland.

Mosquito Killer Lamp

MSRP: $39.99

Sale Price: $29.95 (25% off)

It's pretty hard to get excited about lamps, but what if we told you this one is a ruthless murderer whose weapon of choice is light itself? Don't worry; you and your friends will be safe on your next camping trip. Your mosquito foes, on the other hand ... well, that's a different story.

Mobisan Mobile Plug-In UV Sanitizer Light

MSRP: $59.95

Sale Price: $29.99 (49% off)

We live in disgusting times, but thankfully, we also live in times with access to germ-killing super-light. That's already cool enough, but this UV-C sanitizing light plugs right into the all-purpose communication and information device you keep in your pocket so you can annihilate germs anywhere. The future is alright sometimes.

Mobile Pixels DUEX Pro Portable Dual Monitor

Sale Price: $249.99

Today, we live our lives in front of a screen, but you know what's better than one screen? Two screen. This ingenious device clips onto your laptop and gives you an extra screen for seamless multi-tasking. Go ahead and clip one on every side. Clip one to your dog. Clip one to your face. Always more screen!

Lab Series Bundle: Lab Decanter, Lab Jigger, & Mixing Beaker

MSRP: $78

Sale Price: $62.99 (19% off)

You're probably starting to get pretty bored, cooping yourself up in the house to avoid that whole "deadly pandemic" thing. Why not mix a bunch of chemicals together and see what happens? This decanter, jigger, and mixing beaker will get you off to a great start, you little chemist, you.

360-Degree Rotation Smart AI Object Tracking Gimbal

MSRP: $129.95

Sale Price: $39.99 (69% off)

These days, if it wasn't recorded, it didn't happen, so make the most out of your provable memories with this gimbal. With integrated AI tracking, you can just set your phone on it, press "record," and the gimbal will track you and your loved ones at the dinner table, gathered around the fireplace, shooting potato guns at old dishware, or whatever you're getting up to. That's your business.

Earhoox: AirPod Survival Kit

MSRP: $49.99

Sale Price: $39.99 (20% off)

AirPods have a way of falling out of your ears to their smattering demise, and they are way too expensive for that tendency. Earhoox, fortunately, hook around your ears to make sure the AirPods know their place. This bundle also includes a magnetic strap, a protective case, and even a charging dock for you to lord over those uppity little earbuds. It's high-time they learned some respect.