Does the world sometimes seem like it's a little bit, y'know, on fire? Do you want help, but feel overwhelmed by the onslaught of bad news pouring into your eye holes every time you check Twitter?
Well, that's why Cracked's starting How To Help, a series dedicated to fixing the world's problems until they are all solved and we don't have to write this anymore. Today's topic ...
How To Help With Family Separations At The U.S. Border
Donate $15 to Support Kids at the Border, or contact your representatives with this phone script (scroll down a bit).
Since May 2018, nearly 3,000 migrant children have been forcefully separated from their parents as they tried to enter the U.S., a number any Germanic fairy tale would be jealous of. While their parents go to jail, the children are spirited away to what the government calls "processing centers" and "tender age shelters," but which look like if a supermax had an onsite daycare. But since the news hasn't reported on any new Baby Snatcher bills being passed through Congress, many people are confused as to why this is suddenly happening.
While crossing a border illegally is a misdemeanor offence, like jaywalking or pretending margarine is butter in Iowa, the state is allowed to criminally prosecute people for it, i.e. throw them into actual jails until they get to see a judge. Before now, though, no one ever saw the need to go full Judge Dredd on these families, many of whom are fleeing from violence and poverty in Central America.