After a quick hacksaw job to cut off the handle (because, you know, the handle part isn't medically sound) he jammed the tool in Iturralde's back, presumably with a handful of finishing nails and some copper wire. Unsurprisingly, Sears doesn't make their screwdrivers medical grade and it snapped a few days later, forcing Iturralde to endure several more surgeries.
The next best thing.
The end result was the doctor and the hospital being on the hook for $5.6 million. Really, it sucks that the hospital had to pay, because how could they have known? Oh, wait, because the guy had already had his license suspended in two other states.
Donald Dudley claimed to be a doctor. He also claimed to be a member of the CIA and someone who controlled the entire world, which you will recognize as impeccable credentials if you are crazy. Since Dudley was himself crazier than a shithouse rat, he and his imaginary position with the CIA made him capable of treating a 30-year-old autistic man named Stephen Drummond who had a seizure disorder.
The actual King of the World.
As you might expect, part of his new therapy at the hands of Dudley was to get injected with sodium amytal, have part of his brain erased through the use of hypnotic suggestion and drugs that made him psychotic and delusional. That's just good old fashioned imaginary CIA doctoring right there.
But Dudley really set himself apart when he used his influence over Drummond to train him to be part of the doctor's army that would one day take over all the schools, hospitals and police. Likely this last part was not covered by insurance.
Donald Dudley's credentials
Dudley, whose medical license had been suspended after he was diagnosed as bipolar some years earlier, apparently had a long list of "experimental" treatments on his resume. He once instructed a patient with chronic fatigue syndrome to use martial arts and guns to relax. He was also once found by police in a hotel room with a 15-year-old boy and a small arsenal of guns. Oh, and he believed he was from another planet.
Gun Therapy worked for Hunter S. Thompson. Sort of.
The doctor died (or went back to his home planet) before he could be brought to trial for his malpractice. However insurance ended up paying $2 million to Drummond's family. Meanwhile, somewhere out there an army of rain men and really sleepy ninjas await word from their master to storm local hospitals.
For more Fortey, check out ScenicAnemia.com.
For more reasons to hate and fear doctors, check out 8 Terrifying Instruments Old-Time Doctors Used on Your Junk and 8 Medical Terms Your Doctor Uses to Insult You.
And visit Cracked.com's Top Picks because the Doctors of the Internet can cure what ails ya.