7

Ursula From The Little Mermaid

Ursula is a sea witch, which any marine biologist will tell you means "eight-legged obese mermoctopus." After the movie's heroine, Ariel, meets Prince Eric ("Eric"? Really, Disney?), she decides that she absolutely must become human, probably due to the limitations of human/mermaid sex. Ursula gives her a set of legs in exchange for her voice. Being evil, she makes the trade at the bottom of the ocean. Ariel becomes human and almost drowns, barely managing to make it to shore, and Ursula, who's somehow a heavy smoker, cackles raspily because she totally saw that shit coming.

The Horrific Death:

Near the end of the movie, Ursala blackmails Ariel's father, King Triton, into giving her his magical trident, the One Ring of The Little Mermaid. This allows her to transform into a giant super-Ursula and control the weather.

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6

Scar From The Lion King

Scar is King Mufasa's brother. He not only conspired against and subsequently killed his own brother, but also tried to kill his nephew and (presumably) boned his late brother's wife. This is the sort of thing that goes on all the time among lions, but nobody makes a fuss until they start talking.

5

Shan-Yu From Mulan

Shan-Yu is a Hun warlord who invades China, encouraging Mulan to pretend to be male in order to join the military in her elderly father's place. At one point, she uses a cannon to bury Shan-Yu's army under an avalanche, and to be frank, those fuckers got off easy.

The Horrific Death:

Mulan, whom the movie repeatedly demonstrates is the sole competent human being in China, follows Shan-Yu alone, eventually climbing onto a roof to set up an elaborate trap. Shan-Yu uses his Hun ninja powers to jump through the roof right next to her. Using her fan, Mulan manages to pull his sword out of his hand (it's a cartoon). Just as she is about to kill him, the assistant producer reminds her that this movie needs a G rating. So she uses the sword to pin his cloak to the roof and kicks him instead. Our bloodlust looks like it's going to go woefully unsated. But wait!

It's Deus Ex Machina, the friendly dragon, come to help her! He fires a rocket the size of Texas, strong enough to lift the 600-lb man off his feet and torpedo him into a building crammed full of miscellaneous fireworks. Kapoosh.

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Walt Disney StudiosChinese New Year is hardcore, guys.

4

Clayton From Tarzan

Clayton is a hunter who visits Tarzan's neck of the woods. Everything from the red scarf to the tiny-ass mustache gives off clear douchebag signals. He's the neighbor your father used to hate. Worse, he turns out be a hunter of gorillas (not actually legal), and he shoots Tarzan's adopted daddy to death.

The Horrific Death:

When it comes to jumping around trees in the jungle and swinging from vines, nobody can beat Tarzan, though we suppose a freaking double-barreled shotgun that doesn't need reloading doesn't hurt your cause. Having failed to learn the lessons of history and the first two Rambo films, Clayton decides his superior weaponry is all he needs to fight Tarzan on his own turf. Their struggle ends with Clayton suspended over a cliff, tangled up in vines. He starts hacking away at everything, save for the vines that are tightening around his neck -- which, quite frankly, we would have started with.

Walt Disney StudiosAlso, maybe don't swing so wild near the crotch area ...

3

Gaston From Beauty and the Beast

Gaston is the last thing you would expect to come out of France. He's a big strong hunter who gets all the babes in Belle's town. He brags a lot, and shows off his ultra-manly chest hair almost as often. He ignores the gorgeous blondes who flock after him, instead going after a brunette who has no interest in him whatsoever. This is likely because Belle represents the modern independent woman, who shuns egotistical jerks like Gaston and greatly favors smart guys.

2

Syndrome From The Incredibles

In the old days, when superhero Mr. Incredible fought crime daily on the streets, he met a little inventor kid who wanted to be his sidekick. Mr. Incredible turned him down, and the boy got pissed. After years and years of angsty plotting and becoming the supervillain Syndrome, he finally lures Mr. Incredible to his island to kill him and launch a master plan to ... become a superhero. OK, then!

The Horrific Death:

After the Incredibles foil his plot, Syndrome escapes to steal the family's baby son, Jack-Jack. Child in arms, he flies into the air, laughing maniacally. Jack-Jack then abruptly manifests the power to shapeshift and starts beating the crap out of him. Syndrome drops Jack-Jack and Elastigirl catches him, leaving him without a hostage. Mr. Incredible throws a car at Syndrome's escape plan, knocking him into its engine.

PixarTeaching children the valuable lesson that big brains are lame and worthless next to big muscles. Wait ...

The turbine sucks him up, the razor-sharp blades dicing him into dozens of tiny pieces, turning his body into salsa from the feet up. Mercifully, the plane explodes, ending his agony with a quick fiery death. Who's the superhero now, kid! Not you! Because you're a charred and mutilated corpse!

1

Frollo From The Hunchback Of Notre Dame

Frollo is a bigwig judge in Paris. He has a thing for the dancer Esmeralda, but also wants her to burn in Hell for being so ridiculously hot, as evidenced in the best melodramatic song in any Disney movie ever. He also killed Quasimodo's mother and got Quasi to live in Notre Dame Cathedral, never leaving his entire life.

The Horrific Death:

Frollo finally gets sick of Quasimodo, and wants to kill him along with Esmeralda. Quasi grabs his hand right before he can stab him and completely overpowers the old man. Quasimodo saves Esmeralda and runs outside to the Cathedral roof, conveniently setting the scene for a dramatic final battle. Everyone somehow ends up hanging over a ledge, with Esmeralda holding Quasi and Frollo and flames raging below. Quasimodo fails to let go of Frollo and kill him, and once more the hero is punished for that decision. Frollo swings over to another ledge and draws his sword again. As he prepares to decapitate Esmeralda, he quotes ...

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