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175 Comments

Recent Votes | Show Profanity
  1. gxtmfa

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    Glenn Beck has one good episode, and it's the one about eco terrorists. And it's because it's funny. Really funny.

    Reply
  2. DavidMurray

    • 0

    Glenn beck is a pretentious douche. Oh so funny

    Reply
  3. KatyMonster

    • 0

    ohhhhh gladstone. kocham cie.

    Reply
  4. DUDEMANPIG

    • 0

    GLAADZTONZ SONDZ EGZAKLY LYK BEK WIN HE DUZ EMPORSIATON

    Reply
  5. DUDEMANPIG

    • 0

    GLENNN BEK HZ NAZIE TURRETZ JUST AKKS LOWAS BLAKCK
    GLENNN CUMPARZ EVRYTIN 2 HITLAR OR STALLIN OR COMMYNIZM
    GLEN SOKZ BALLZ

    Reply
  6. thamuzicaddict

    • 0

    "Glenn Beck is THE greatest comedian of our time! Too bad he's not joking."
    Yeah, and too bad his act doesn't contain any actual jokes.

    Reply
    1. jogiff

      • 0

      What about the fat Mormon guy. He's a pretty good joke.

  7. HMDK

    • 0

    RaistliniltsiaR.
    Ahhahha... You're one of the new creationists. Too bad we still have the old school ones still shambling about drooling in the exact same fashion. Hey, guess who's lobbying against any kind of reform to maybe just pollute a little less? Why, the very ones who'd be more regulated because they contribute more to the problem.
    Fair enough, I guess you'd say, as that is just the "marketplace of ideas".
    But here's the catch: Why the fuck are they so underhanded about it?
    And, seriously, here's why you're just like a creationist or an antiabortionist: This idea that scientists are somehow making insane profits off of some kind of conspiracy. How the hell does that even work:
    "Oh, yeah, I made mad scrilla today, bro! Got showered with phat grant money by the government when I told 'em my research showed they'd better stop taking the easiest industry donations and instead start institutin' real reform. Then I went and and broke the bank performin' abortions in exchange fo

    Reply
    1. narco_sloth

      • 0

      why the hell are you trying to debate over a comment board? your inane incoherent rants are up there with Glenn Beck's.

  8. idunno3

    • 0

    Glenn Beck is THE greatest comedian of our time! Too bad he's not joking.

    Reply
  9. MertonVHislop

    • 0

    Eliosenor, I have to take issue with your rule #4. Yes, I realise that headsets have been used by terrible people, but they can also be used for good, by someone like Dara O'briain, who is awesome.

    Reply
  10. orypeci

    • 0

    Anyone else seriously reminded of Alan Shore from Boston Legal when Glen Beck comes on screen?

    Reply
  11. RaistliniltsiaR

    • 0

    Ahhh Gladstone, ya wacky liberal.
    *shrug*
    I'm a conservative, and I have to put up with a LOT of liberal stuff on Cracked, but I do it. Why? Because objectively, most of the stuff on here is funny as shit. I've come to expect it. I do wish to say, however:
    1) Global warming is a mere earthly cycle, not something to flip out over.
    2) Bailouts are a really, really stupid idea. Some companies fail - that's just how it works. You really think pouring money into unsuccessful businesses is the way to save the economy?

    Reply
    1. Texhn0lyze

      • 0

      Bailouts for the "corporate real republicans" aren't the point. You don't understand a thing about economics and probably have no idea what liberals actually think.

    2. DHeadshot

      • 0

      I've never got why people who want to destroy the natural world label themselves as "conservatives"?

  12. elliosenor

    • 0

    A few rules for self-proclaimed comedians and comedy promo makers (and this comes from a guy who's gone to FOUR OR FIVE UCB SHOWS):
    1. AT LEAST ONE JOKE. At least shitty films show the one or two "funniest" parts in their previews. This promo has no jokes, ergo: there is no funniest part of Glenn Beck.
    2. Apropos of Rule 1: PSEUDO-JOKES DON'T COUNT. A joke either has to (a) be funny and/or (b) make a funny (and maybe profound) point. Goofy faces, voices, and pontifications on vomit foam don't cut it.
    3. Apropos of Rule 2: THAT "GOT MILK" SHIT IS FUNNY *NOWHERE*. Nowhere. Not even ironically. Put that shit on in Williamsburg, and I don't care how skinny your jeans are; you are going to have the everloving shit kicked out of you by Of Montreal. Fun fact: According to Wikipedia, this campaign came out in October 1993 and stopped being funny in early November 1993 [citation needed].
    4. NO HEADSETS! Visible headsets have the power of 32 giant signs reading "I'm A Fucking Douchebag.

    Reply
  13. Coxxy

    • 0

    I must agree with Cube13

    Reply
  14. ToastMeister

    • 0

    Yawn

    Reply
  15. Cube13

    • 0

    Respectfully, I must dissent. It's my understanding that Beck's audience on his comedy tour were urinating on themselves from laughing so hard. His socialism bit goes over like a white Chris Rock. Beck's a comedic genius and any satire of his work by Mr. Gladstone or anyone should be frowned upon. Attica! Attica! Attica!

    Reply
    1. aleatharhea

      • 0

      A lot of people will laugh forcibly, tellingly too loud and too long, when any buffoon attempts to make fun of anyone and anything with which they bitterly disagree. Also, these are the same folks who laugh until they cry at "Git'R Done!" I have no problem believing they were urinating themselves, but you should've checked their pants before Beck started.

  16. soulardbill

    • 0

    well the limpublicans are lining up one by one and stepping off a cliff ,of course they dont understand normal people there rich and want to stay that way ,no matter what happens to america.God forbid someone gets a bj there the most dogooding rat snitchs the world has ever known.Ill bet he gives his show for free like rush limbo and the silly radio stations eat it up cause they have nothing out of pocket i WONDER WHO PAYS RUSH /BECK if there doin it for free ,one thing is for sure i will never listen to kmox in st louis again because of these guys so gj. Ok america has awaken and we get it so cut the bullshizzt,find somthing else to hate like your dog lol tata for now

    Reply
  17. Earthbound_X

    • 0

    Damn, people are going crazy in these comments.
    It was just a joke guys, calm down.

    Reply
  18. Baloun

    • 0

    i've heard him say it on his broadcast before, "I'm not a Journalist" maybe in his performance he'll say "I'm not even a carbon based human."

    Reply
  19. auslander

    • 0

    I was kinda like, "Eh." But then it hit me . . . "Wait. This guy actually thinks that this is FUNNY. He's actually talking about going out and going on stage and spewing this crap and thinking of himself as a stand-up comedian. HOLY SHIT!" Wow. That's extra-special. What sorts of venues will he be hitting, I wonder? You can't really imagine that many people who enjoy a night of comedy are gonna think, "I know! Let's head out and watch that right-wing nutball recycle Rush Limbaugh's material!" So . . . rural high-school auditoriums, maybe?

    Reply
    1. aleatharhea

      • 0

      sorry, Dpost

  20. TheEnemyBelow

    • 0

    I saw a YouTube Clip of Beck today!!
    God,he was going just plain Bat Shyt Crazy!!
    To hear him go on and on,Obama's"The Manchurian Candidate";
    "FEMA's Running Concentration Camps";"Our Children Are Being Sold Into Slavery";EtAl!!
    Jesus;Buddha and Mohammed!!!
    Sad Thing Is Folks Actually Beleive His Shyt!!

    Reply
    1. aleatharhea

      • 0

      If I had a cell phone, I would so have his "GET OFF MY PHONE! GET OFF MY PHONE!" freakout/meltdown as a ringtone.

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