15 Attractive Girls In My Life Who Will Never Sleep With Me

AaronP

12/08/11 06:57 AM

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"Helen of f*****g Troy" is how it should always be said.

CMSellers

10/27/11 04:46 PM

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1. This is basically how I feel, except with a completely different group of girls. (For example, I have neither friends nor attractive female co-workers.)
2. Your voice sounds exactly like mine with an Australian accent. (In other words, less obnoxious. Have you ever heard a New Englander talk?)
3. Now, I want to make a video like that. Except mine will be all creepy instead of funny. Maybe I'll use actual photos of said girls for maximum stalkerish effect.

cutenfluffy316

11/16/10 09:21 PM

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Is this the 3 minute philosophy dude?

svc

10/26/09 05:25 AM

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This is pure genius!

upsetGoldfish

10/26/09 04:44 AM

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I have a number 9, who is also a number 6. It's annoying. I am a WasteyMcLife though, not exactly helping... :P

kitourahime

06/08/09 08:53 PM

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DDD= I'll sleep with you! ...do you like petite goths?

DHeadshot

06/04/09 05:25 AM

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Finally! A video that merges Cracked with Zero Punctuation...

1. 

   redraccoon

   04/14/10 04:05 PM

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   DIDO!

postmanjoe

05/01/09 01:13 AM

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wow Nyxi, please stfu and why would girlfriends automatically go gay for you? check your ego at the door...

Wic76

03/31/09 06:37 AM

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Lmao the "they all look like Helen of fucking Troy" bit cracked me up.
Hey, cracked me up, cracked... I only just go that...

csturges

02/10/09 10:50 AM

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I have a feeling Nxyi is a number 10...

saratonin

01/29/09 04:44 PM

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Don't give up! This sounds exactly like my boyfriend before he got me. I'm number nine, the one you meet over the internet so yeah...
Awesome video, I like it very much.

matthew0820

12/27/08 05:10 PM

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how narrow minded/bitchy/unhumourous can u actually be to not like this video

Normuh

12/07/08 07:59 PM

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:) it's adorable

ElCapitan

12/07/08 04:45 AM

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Nyxi, he said ATTRACTIVE girls.

DapperDaveIa

12/05/08 10:37 AM

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I thought it was very funny. I've watched it several times and have even stolen quotes to use on my friends who now think I'm witty. Thank you S Peter Davis.

chanhassen

11/28/08 06:10 PM

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I don't think I liked this.

Nyxi

11/28/08 02:25 PM

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If you're gonna whine about all the women who wont sleep with you, at least make it funny. *sighs* and i would've slept with you if this hadnt been so WEAK.

artemis_clyde

11/25/08 02:56 PM

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your bakery line is classic.

Gregoclock

11/24/08 09:10 AM

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great video, pretty much the best one I've watched on here for months.

wordywonder

11/23/08 12:35 AM

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This just cracks me up every single time. Still funny.