Quick Fixes

Article

March 07, 2013

The 6 Most Impressively Nerdy Marriage Proposals

By Cullen Adams | 212,827 Views

Some couples believe that a marriage proposal doesn't count unless it involves a Spider-Man costume and a sonic screwdriver, rather than the orange-juice-laden screwdrivers that accompany traditional marriage proposals.

#6. At a Doctor Who Exhibit

Doctor Who superfan Matt Smith took his equally Who-dazzled girlfriend to the Doctor Who Experience Exhibit in London, because where the fuck else would that be. Once they arrived, he slipped away from his tour group and donned the costume of the current Doctor (who coincidentally is played by an actor named Matt Smith) and pretended to be a part of the exhibit, which is to say he stood around looking British. When his girlfriend walked by, he took a knee and proposed, and she accepted (hopefully realizing that he was not an enchanted Time Lord mannequin).

Matthew Lloyd / Stringer / Getty
The Brits take their Doctor Who seriously.

Article

March 06, 2013

6 Hilarious Cases of Online Voting Contests Gone Awry

By Catherine Toast | 1,408,500 Views

Every now and then, some company decides to put a major marketing campaign in the hands of online voters, because they apparently do not understand that the Internet is populated by people who use the Internet.

#6. Greenpeace Names a Whale

Greenpeace tagged a group of whales in the South Pacific in an attempt to keep them from being poached by the Japanese, because it would appear that Greenpeace tags can deflect harpoon blasts. They then held an online poll to name the animals. The finalist names included Kaimana (Hawaiian for "power of the ocean"), Shanti (Sanskrit for "tranquility"), and for some reason Mr. Splashy Pants, which sounds less like a whale and more like a man shitting himself in an uncontrollable frenzy. To the surprise of absolutely no one, the contest was soon swallowed up by Reddit and Boing Boing, who showered Mr. Splashy Pants with 78 percent of the vote before turning him into a meme, because that's how the Internet works.

Alexis Ohanian via Wikipedia
Behold, the fruit of human ingenuity.

Videos

March 05, 2013

The Worst Snack Slogan of All Time

By The Kids Table | 147,631 Views

Article

March 04, 2013

3 Comic Book Moments That Prove Batman is Bad at Hiring

By Jose Luis Lopez | 246,752 Views

Despite his genius-level intelligence and impossible techno-wizardry, Batman shows a confusing lack of wisdom and restraint when recruiting allies.

#3. Batman Kidnaps Two Different Robins

Jason Todd is a street kid who steals the tires off of the Batmobile, which historically is a car that has a jet engine and machine guns and can probably fucking fly, but in this particular iteration is a blue Ferrari with no discernible superpowers beyond attracting a lot of goddamn attention.

DC Comics
Batman was really into his Miami Vice phase at this point.