Quick Fixes

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May 10, 2013

3 Signs This Naked Fugitive Is from the Future

By CRACKED Staff | 273,852 Views

In films, when you're dealing with conspiracy, time travel, or pod people, there's always that point where the protagonist is going to look batshit crazy when seen out of context. Case in point -- the beginning to every Terminator film, which teaches us that even the survival of mankind will seem silly if there's a bare penis swinging in the room.

But faith will always require us to jump the shark of our own disbelief, which is why we've chosen to share with you all a real-life man from the future. This man:


"Your blur effects. Give them to me."

Article

May 09, 2013

6 Hilariously Mundane Ways Prisoners Are Using Social Media

By CRACKED Staff | 256,334 Views

Facebook is basically a really depressing life resume -- a collection of every minute victory, ranging from your last warm meal to that one time you saw the tower where they filmed Die Hard. No story is too small to catalog in the vast annals of your short and harsh life as you quest for digital immortality, or at the very least attempt to bone that girl you worked with three years ago.

Because of its highlight-reel-like nature, the social network also happens to be pretty much the same ego-churning factory for everyone. It doesn't matter if they're on the top or bottom rung. How do we know this? Because thanks to the Tennessee penal system, the bottom rung apparently has that kind of access.

WSMV Nashville

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May 08, 2013

The Rap Video That Is Clearly About Stalking Kim Kardashian

By David Christopher Bell | 82,509 Views

If you're like us, you probably have no desire to learn about every jackass who's been inside Kim Kardashian. That said, one of these jackasses, famed sex partner Ray J, has recently released a new single called "I Hit It First."

The song is clearly about Kim:

Article

May 07, 2013

3 Products That Completely Defeat the Purpose of Camping

By Benjamin Buso | 219,235 Views

Camping sucks. If people were meant to sleep on the ground, we wouldn't have invented houses. Fortunately, that fact isn't lost on some makers of camping equipment. The companies on this list understand a fundamental truth that will keep them in business for as long as they want to keep working. That truth, of course, is that the only way to make camping fun is to make it feel like you're sitting in your living room.

Here are three products that completely defeat the "purpose" of camping.

#3. The AC Boot

The Outdoor AC People

When a camping accident happens, the ability to maintain a constant five-star-hotel-like climate inside the tent will almost never be the difference between life and death. But still, it's a great option to have when sleeping under a roof like an employed person isn't possible.

Fortunately, the AC Boot can give you that option. Well, seeing as how the "product" mostly amounts to cutting a hole in the side of your tent and sticking an air conditioner (not included) in that hole, a pocketknife and a small table will give you that option also. The good folks at AC Boot will type up some instructions on how to do it, put those instructions in a box, and sell you that box for $199.95, though.

The Outdoor AC People
With a nylon cover to protect your idiocy from the elements!