If our eternal news-checking series has taught us anything, it's that nobody's perfect. Old salts like CNN can screw the pooch just as hard as web-born companies trying to tackle a story first instead of making sure to tackle it correctly. We get that. This is probably why up-and-comer Vox -- which proudly calls themselves a "new kind of news site" -- has fucked up stories at least 46 times in the 10 months it's been around.
While that is hilariously awful, grossly misunderstanding a story is still infinitely better than lazily choosing not to explore it past a single grabby headline in exchange for ad revenue -- as seems to be the case with the following willfully misinterpreted news stories ...
#6. That Video of Men Catcalling Their Mothers Is Faaaaaaaake
"Social experiment" videos are a great idea when done genuinely, but not everyone has time to walk around New York for 10 hours to showcase the problems with street harassment. Luckily, there's another handy trick called "just faking it" -- because nothing says "we want to shed light on a serious and totally real problem" better than hiring actors to re-create scumbaggery in exchange for completely subverting your message. And now this happened:
Spoiler: no, they won't.
The midseason premiere of The Walking Dead just hit, and honestly, it looks like they're making some changes for the better. It is a completely different animal than anyone was expecting, which, for a show that relies so heavily on doing the exact same thing season after season, is something fans should be pretty excited about.
But that's just one episode. There are certain recurring plot devices that The Walking Dead continuously rehashes to the point that they are now starting to reek more than the zombies that occasionally appear on the show. If this season of The Walking Dead wants to continue being surprising and exciting, it needs to avoid the following storytelling crutches it's been leaning on since Rick stumbled out of that hospital five years ago.
#5. A Character Always Struggles to Accept That Zombies Aren't People
In a show about people turning into zombies, it's expected that we will see the plot point of a character grappling with the thought of killing a zombified loved one. That's, like, the first box you check for Zombie Movie Bingo. But season after season, the writers keep dragging out this trope and pretending it's a brand-new plot development.
We're not even sure what season this is from.
Anybody who's ever dealt with a delivery has had at least one order go awry. Maybe you wanted pepperoni on your pizza and instead got anchovies, or maybe that Fleshlight you sent away for arrived with the fun part tragically sealed up. Mistakes happen, is what we're saying.
But some delivery boo-boos have consequences that can't be fixed by yelling at someone on the phone and getting a refund -- you know, stuff like traumatizing hundreds of kids or accidentally helping fund ISIS. The next time you get your neighbor's phone bill by mistake, be glad it was just that and not something like ...
#4. Summer School Accidentally Sends 100 Porn DVDs to Children
Over the summer, hundreds of students took part in Edinburgh Playhouse's summer stage sessions, learning valuable lessons about stage premise, enunciation, and what the fuck Cats is actually about. In December, the school sent out DVDs that were supposed to contain pictures and video of the kids' experiences and performances there. What the children actually got, however, was less Kinky Boots and more kinky everything. As in, they fucking sent porn to kids -- directly to kids, since the DVDs were specifically addressed to them, not their parents.
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"What was the name of the camp again?"
It's finally happened. That thing that we've been worrying about since the show aired its first season way back in 2011. Game of Thrones has now run out of books to adapt.
Once again, we did warn you.
The trailer for Season 5 just had its unofficial premiere a few days ago via leaked footage from the recent IMAX screening of two of last season's episodes. It's clear from the snippets in the trailer that this season is going all the way through the final existing book, A Dance With Dragons. The new season won't even have any of Bran, the only character in a major television series to spend most of his screen time riding in a basket on the back of a learning-disabled giant (Hodor, the aforementioned giant, will also be missing). Why? Because they've already filmed everything George R.R. Martin has ever written about those two characters. So, if you're a fan of the show, anxious to see what happens to Bran beyond The Wall ... too bad. You'll have to wait until next year, when the showrunners will have to start writing the show scripts based on Martin's rough plan, rather than his fully fleshed-out books.
"Uh, 80 percent of this script is just the word 'tits.'"