WARNING: THE FOLLOWING VIDEO CONTAINS EXTREME GRAPHIC IMAGES. PLEASE TAKE A MOMENT TO STEEL YOURSELF.
Are you ready? Because it's time to talk about piracy. Here's an extremely revealing list of the most-pirated TV shows of the last year. That's important; we'll come back to it in a moment. Now watch this:
For those of you too scared to watch the video, it's an announcement of something that will surely be standard practice in Hollywood within five years: A full month before it hits theaters, you can instantly download the "Best Horror Film of the Year," John Dies at the End (yes, based on the novel I wrote, motherfucker), on Amazon Instant Video, iTunes, the PlayStation Network, Xbox 360's Zune service, and pretty much any other on-demand streaming service out there. Soon, this Day One Downloading will be the way it's going to work for all movies, and for fans, this is a good thing. Especially in this case, as this is a movie you're absolutely going to want to watch without pants the first time through.
Which brings us back to that list I linked to earlier.
Whenever the hermit state of North Korea decides to put its own spin on global pop culture, the world takes notice, as it's not unlike witnessing familiar arts and entertainment performed by Kryptonian warlords trapped in that Phantom Zone.
"You can't hear us, but we're totally performing the score to Oklahoma! right now."
Coming up with the cover photo for a Christmas album isn't something you should overthink. Slap Santa or a tree on there and you're pretty much good to go. But these albums tried to do something different, and accidentally turned Christmas into a holiday of horrors.
#5. Nutcracker Suite
Our demographics skew heavily toward fans of 1960s easy listening music, so we're sure we don't have to tell you that Andre Kostelanetz was an orchestra conductor who pioneered the genre. And if you could explain to us why his Nutcracker Suite cover is so terrifying, we would be immensely grateful.
Why is a wolf-tiger hybrid groping its own tail while it plots to eat that girl? Why is a clown head sitting in a bush? Was the clown decapitated? If so, why'd he die with such a smile on his face? What part of the Nutcracker Suite was that in? Is that a log next to the clown head, or a slowly decomposing alligator? Why isn't the cold preserving its corpse? Has there always been this much snow in hell?
So many questions.