It's not until you reach a certain station in life that people start naming things after you. It's supposed to be an honor, but sometimes famous people end up with their names attached to some truly terrible things. For example ...
#3. The "Lesbian" Worm Named After President Obama
Most American presidents get things named after them after their time in office, and the things are impressively masculine objects like a mighty airport or an entire class of supercarriers. But then, Barack Obama is no ordinary American president.
That's not what we mean.
Videos of apocalyptic destruction raining down from the heavens spontaneously flooded YouTube last night. It turned out to be a meteor strike that obliterated a building and shattered windows in Chelyabinsk, Russia.
But long before the news media was on the scene, social media was full of video clips of the impact (this is mostly thanks to the fact that many Russian cars have dashboard cameras on at all times). And while we would never stereotype one nationality or race of people, after watching dozens of these videos, we have deduced that Russian people just don't give a fuck.
People like to talk about the power of music, but we're all pretty much agreed that in reality, even the most rocking Springsteen song can't stop a bullet or cure a disease. The musicians in these stories would beg to differ, though.
#3. Sarajevo Residents Brave Mortar Shells for a Rebooted Version of Hair
When Srdjan Jevdjevic and Amir Beso, two Bosnian musicians, staged a reworked version of the musical Hair that featured political statements and "James Brown meets Metallica" renditions of the songs, a description that you might recognize as the opposite of "commercially viable," they regularly drew sellout crowds.
People invent some baffling things. As the Internet has spent the past two decades demonstrating, people do equally baffling things with their pets. Invariably, these two truths collide and result in people submitting patent applications for inventions intended for use by (or on) animals that will detonate your eyeballs with concentrated beams of mind-rending lunacy.