You remember the ultra-popular game show Who Wants to Be a Millionaire, right? It was a cultural phenomenon that dominated the prime time television lineup like no other game show ever had or likely ever will. The show was packed with drama, had an adorable host, and most importantly, allowed the person answering the questions to ask for help from the audience and people at home.
"On the keypad in front of you, please enter how many dicks you'd like our contestant to suck ..."
The children's cartoon My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic inexplicably has a legion of obsessively weird adult male fans who proudly refer to themselves as "bronies," because the Internet has made it much easier for people to confuse "individuality" with "being a sociopath." We've collected some of the bronies' more bafflingly insane fan creations, which we feel are enough to qualify as red flags on any background check.
#4. Porn Comics
They could at least have the decency to leave "beat" off the cover.
All of us have foods we don't want to touch. It's not that we're picky eaters; it's just that Brussels sprouts and broccoli are gross, no matter how badly the first lady wants us to enjoy them.
But what really makes us picky eaters is foods we won't touch simply because they sound gross. That's why marketers are able to laugh at us from their penthouses with gold-plated toilets -- they can sell us anything. With the right name.
#4. Chilean Sea Bass Used to Be Patagonian Toothfish
For some reason, this adorable little swimmer, despite being undeniably delicious, just didn't move a lot of units. Because a fish is really only as delicious as the number of people who buy it, a change was obviously in order. Lee Lantz was the man to make that change happen. Disillusioned with his paltry toothfish sales, he just up and changed the name of the hideous-looking seabeast to Chilean sea bass, which, for all intents and purposes, it absolutely is not.
Dead-eyed stink-brick might have been more accurate.
Homeland nabbed a slew of Golden Globes recently. It's no wonder: Between rampant infidelity, terrorism, dirty politics, and murder, the Brodys are the Hindenburg of suburban families. Their story is tragic, sure, but it's impossible to not watch.
At least that's the case for the most part. As they say, every chain has a weak link, and for the Brodys, the go-to moment destroyer is Chris Brody, the innocent son who's painfully oblivious to the litany of life-threatening situations and hair-raising events this caught-in-the-middle clan endures on a regular basis. He's clueless about the disarray around him to the point that we sometimes wonder if he maybe just understands it all too well and is reverting to some earlier state of childhood, the age of 4, perhaps, as some kind of defense mechanism.
In an episode from Season 2, for example, the Brody family is put up in a fancy high-rise penthouse under CIA protective custody. While the rest of the family perfectly grasps the gravity of the situation -- that being the very real possibility that they will all be killed -- Chris darts around the new digs, marveling at the size of the televisions like he's been in a coma since 1999 and has never seen a flat screen before.
"A Sega Dreamcast? And a PlayStation?"