Quick Fixes

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March 09, 2013

5 Reasons Daredevil Has the Worst Villains Ever Invented

By Jonathan D. Pearl | 229,158 Views

The popularity of certain superheroes, such as Batman and Spider-Man, is occasionally eclipsed by the staggering awesomeness of their gallery of foes. Daredevil is not one of those superheroes.

#5. The Masked Marauder

Marvel Comics
"Get it? Because he's blind! Ah, fuck it, just put Spider-Man's face on the cover; maybe somebody will buy it by accident."

Article

March 08, 2013

Why the World's Most Advanced Robot Is Going to Kill Us All

By M. Asher Cantrell | 148,648 Views

Everyone loves BigDog, Boston Dynamics' quadrupedal bot that looks like it's continuously doing some sort of country line dance to stay upright. It's an amazing machine that can walk over all kinds of terrain, including rocks, without faltering a step. It's easily one of the most viable walking robots we've got. It won't do your dishes or anything, but it's amazing for transportation and logistics.

That's if you buy the company line, of course. We see something a little darker hiding in BigDog's artificial soul, however. A story of abuse and rage is written all over its ... face? Does it have a face? Anyway, the point is, the scientists behind BigDog are about to make a huge mistake.

Recently, they released a video of BigDog tossing cinder blocks across a large room. It's an impressive showcase of BigDog's ability to clear out rubble, for example. But look at how it throws those blocks:

Boston Dynamics
"Fffffuuuuuuck you!"

Article

March 07, 2013

The 6 Most Impressively Nerdy Marriage Proposals

By Cullen Adams | 214,201 Views

Some couples believe that a marriage proposal doesn't count unless it involves a Spider-Man costume and a sonic screwdriver, rather than the orange-juice-laden screwdrivers that accompany traditional marriage proposals.

#6. At a Doctor Who Exhibit

Doctor Who superfan Matt Smith took his equally Who-dazzled girlfriend to the Doctor Who Experience Exhibit in London, because where the fuck else would that be. Once they arrived, he slipped away from his tour group and donned the costume of the current Doctor (who coincidentally is played by an actor named Matt Smith) and pretended to be a part of the exhibit, which is to say he stood around looking British. When his girlfriend walked by, he took a knee and proposed, and she accepted (hopefully realizing that he was not an enchanted Time Lord mannequin).

Matthew Lloyd / Stringer / Getty
The Brits take their Doctor Who seriously.

Article

March 06, 2013

6 Hilarious Cases of Online Voting Contests Gone Awry

By Catherine Toast | 1,439,207 Views

Every now and then, some company decides to put a major marketing campaign in the hands of online voters, because they apparently do not understand that the Internet is populated by people who use the Internet.

#6. Greenpeace Names a Whale

Greenpeace tagged a group of whales in the South Pacific in an attempt to keep them from being poached by the Japanese, because it would appear that Greenpeace tags can deflect harpoon blasts. They then held an online poll to name the animals. The finalist names included Kaimana (Hawaiian for "power of the ocean"), Shanti (Sanskrit for "tranquility"), and for some reason Mr. Splashy Pants, which sounds less like a whale and more like a man shitting himself in an uncontrollable frenzy. To the surprise of absolutely no one, the contest was soon swallowed up by Reddit and Boing Boing, who showered Mr. Splashy Pants with 78 percent of the vote before turning him into a meme, because that's how the Internet works.

Alexis Ohanian via Wikipedia
Behold, the fruit of human ingenuity.