4 Awesome Scenes You'll Never See in the 'Star Wars' Movies

#2. Cloud City Turns into Thunderdome After Lando Leaves

The Cloud City mining facility is the kind of nonsense that could only result from George Lucas getting high during a game of Frisbee golf. Lando just kind of abandons the place at the end of The Empire Strikes Back to go join the rebellion, and according to the expanded universe, the entire facility devolves into a dystopian hamster cage, primarily because he left Beats by Dre Moby in charge:

"Of all those that I would spy on, while masturbating, I'll miss you most of all, sir."

That's background character-turned expanded universe juggernaut Lobot, a human whose brain is directly connected to the Cloud City's computer, and who goes total banana shits crazy the instant Lando leaves him behind.

In the awesomely titled Star Wars comic "Coffin in the Clouds," Lando returns to Cloud City to find a murderous Lobot and a bunch of explosives set by disgruntled workers. Lando is able to rehabilitate Lobot by getting his ass booted off of the city by a treacherous companion:

"My only regret is that I didn't enjoy one more cool, refreshing Colt 45. It worked every time."

Lobot springs into action and grabs the nearest emergency jet pack (which are apparently as common as fire alarms in a floating city) to save his boss/BFF:

*Play for full effect*

They crash land on the planet's surface and end up kicking the shit out of a bunch more disgruntled workers to get the facility back under control, because that's how a strong administrator corrects poor morale.

#1. Jabba the Hutt's Death Triggered Evil Murderer Robots

Perhaps the only villain in the original Star Wars trilogy with a more inglorious death than Boba Fett is Jabba the Hutt, the notorious space racketeer who speaks in fat guy Pig Latin and has a fetish for coked-out women in gold bikinis.

In the expanded universe (specifically, the Star Wars roleplaying game), Jabba's death sparks a whole slew of mob wars and revenge attempts, none more amazing than the robot massacre arranged by Jabba himself using a bunch of Hutt war droids programmed to activate in the event of his death:

"Hey, asshole, maybe if you had us activated while you were alive you could have avoided the whole dying thing. Just sayin'."

Called the Mos Eisley Mourners, these four ancient droids were hidden around Jabba's stomping ground of Mos Eisley and designed to execute a murder program the instant Jabba's slimy, bloated heart ceased to beat. Their orders were terrifyingly simple -- they just started walking in four different directions, killing everything in their way while chanting "We mourn for the exalted Jabba, we cry for the magnificent Jabba, we grieve for the illustrious Jabba" over and over again until reaching specific predetermined targets that Jabba assumed would probably be responsible for his demise. The Mos Eisley Mourners would then space-murder the ever-loving Dooku out of said targets, because Jabba the Hutt's spite is eternal.

We think Jabba's army of unstoppable killbots would've been way more unnerving if they blasted his theme song.

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