#1. Val Kilmer Is the Most Val Kilmer Val Kilmer Alive
Val Kilmer's career trajectory -- going from Iceman to Batman to full-time Mark Twain impersonator -- is a pretty huge flapping red flag in terms of just how wall-scrawling crazy Val Kilmer is becoming on the daily. That, and the fact that his other Twitter account is the digital equivalent of John Doe's apartment in Se7en.
Looking at these pictures means you'll be dead in five days.
And did you know he makes and sells collages? Because surprise! You're about to never unknow that fact:
So you're probably asking yourself, "Besides specter photography and the first drafts of ransom notes, what else has Val Kilmer been up to?" Well, he also posts random fading colors with little to no explanation ...
... and eschews Hollywood glamour for canned beans and reading his Bible next to sheer cliff faces in a manner befitting a good backwoods survivalist (instead of a man accustomed to playing with the boys).
"I've been reusing the same can for two years."
Most Deranged Tweet:
It's a tossup between his obituary for Lou Reed, which we'll let speak for itself:
Run for your life, Ross. RUN FOR YOUR LIFE.
Seems like these people could've benefited from this guide: 24 Basic Goddamn Rules We Should Start Enforcing Online.