25 Rejected Ideas From Grand Theft Auto IV

NICEEEE #1 ♥it!!!! ^_^

11/19/2009 01:04:56 PM

Hikaru-chan

Thank you very much for the lesson. I knew that I can do this in better way. pret auto

06/16/2009 06:31:00 PM

Personally, I thought #3 was the best; that had me cracking up for a moment. And not just because it's throwing puppies! The puppies were fine, as you could clearly see; the funny comes from the second puppy exploding a car. Exploding puppies means instant funny. Keep this in mind, Cracked! .. Also... kinda bringing this up out of no-where, but, eh.

02/22/2009 11:03:00 PM

Aderas

the san quentin one shouldve beenh higher in the list.

08/07/2008 12:17:00 PM

willyhassertt

Hey guys! Hasn t Reebok been the coolest since really long. I heard about their new range. Checked it out on http://www.reebokhexride.com/?um=11 Cool stuff.

05/31/2008 06:18:00 AM

sahilshah

Hey guys! Hasn t Reebok been the coolest since really long. I heard about their new range. Checked it out on http://www.reebokhexride.com/?um=11 Cool stuff.

05/31/2008 06:18:00 AM

sahilshah

A friend from -----blackgirlsconnect.com----- said he was so sad to Chinese Earthquake, many SiChuan people died of it. A lot of videos and pics are on this site, good for Chinese people.

05/27/2008 08:24:00 PM

robinjane

correction: #24 shouldve been #1

05/22/2008 11:53:00 AM

Kowboy

#2 should've been #1. Good job HairyBall.

05/22/2008 11:51:00 AM

Kowboy

#9 should have been #2 - that was amazing!

05/17/2008 12:37:00 PM

El_Arab

The "Give Dr. Dre A Prostate Exam" mission was by FAR the best....

05/08/2008 07:06:00 AM

cKHAVIKk

As soon as I saw monocle's in the forums, I knew it'd win. It's like a good one-liner; more immediately funny.

05/06/2008 05:41:00 PM

Jono

Hyperglavin's was the best

05/05/2008 10:39:00 PM

Epileptic Pirate

Nope, I just like to share. Sure I'd prefer it if people find my posts funny. Some will, most won't. Clearly you are thirsting to feel superior. You have my pity.

05/05/2008 02:45:00 PM

Jenna_Tullwortz

24's got my vote.

05/04/2008 04:20:00 PM

canhazlol?

YAAAR least funny wins again mateys.

05/03/2008 10:20:00 PM

SanitizingKing

why on earth would you post something to amuse yourself? couldnt you just think it? clearly you are thirsting for approval.

05/03/2008 09:16:00 PM

bunni

I like that game! I saw the secret passwords on the site blackmatching.com. That's a really cool secret stage!

05/03/2008 06:13:00 PM

crazyjoe1

I could do the mission in #7! "Islands in the stream. That is what we are. No one in between. How can we be wrong? Sail away with me, to another world ..."

05/03/2008 06:01:00 AM

DrFreakazoid

meh the last one wasn't that great, "Guy from GTA4 dances...?." However the rest of them were UNREAL :D

05/03/2008 05:34:00 AM

mxsone

Only if you promise not to strike me down with your vicious sarcasm. Oops, too late. BURN PEASANT!

05/02/2008 08:39:00 PM

Jenna_Tullwortz

OK, OK, so other people already said that. Please, pretty please Jenna, don't burn me with your searing rage...

05/02/2008 08:13:00 PM

johnnye87

What? The winning idea was "Wouldn't it be ridiculous if there was a dance challenge mission in GTA?" In San Andreas you had to do one on the beach, one in a lowrider, and god knows how many on dates.

05/02/2008 08:08:00 PM

johnnye87

number 10 was hilarious. 18 & 19 were pretty good too.

05/02/2008 07:36:00 PM

SiXELA295

haha I love number 17 great job

05/02/2008 04:55:00 PM

blackfalcon817

@Onodera. It doesn't really bother me how they decide the winner. As I'd stated earlier I just post what makes ME laugh. If others find it funny, too that's a bonus. It's certainly not a requirement, though.

05/02/2008 04:48:00 PM

Jenna_Tullwortz

Boy, Yuckmouth I really gotta admire the fact that your determination to be a complete shithead is such that you'd mock me for a point of view I don't actually even have. If you'd actually read my post you'd know it wasn't a big deal to me and if you did then you're either ignoring that fact or are incredibly stupid. Either way.. swing and a miss! Grab some pine, meat.

05/02/2008 04:45:00 PM

Jenna_Tullwortz

Although it didn't make the list, Sam Lowery's rape targeting system in the archives made me laugh like hell.

05/02/2008 02:30:00 PM

McBeefy

hahaha, i loved #17!

05/02/2008 01:36:00 PM

punkywaffle

Jenna..like boo-hoo... it's cracked not the Nobel Prize.

05/02/2008 01:04:00 PM

Yuckmouth

Jenna: You are correct, there are many times where super funny craptions are trapped at the bottom, as who really has time to scroll all the way down? That is why the fans should not judge these either. However, we should voice our kudos in the comment section to the ones we liked best.

05/02/2008 12:45:00 PM

Onodera

no.11 is hella funny... lol! ;p

05/02/2008 11:43:00 AM

purple16heaven

#14 was the best, by far.

05/02/2008 08:37:00 AM

Pootah

Hehe, I didnt make the list but at least they used my entry as a thumbnail for the article

05/02/2008 05:54:00 AM

ChrisP

You can never go wrong with exploding puppies :) Tankhead was oh so very lame. Nothing funny about that.

05/02/2008 04:42:00 AM

Sigma

#9 made me choke on my coffee.

05/02/2008 12:38:00 AM

SandmanX

The Sporks cheat is fucking genius.

05/01/2008 09:19:00 PM

BobDobolina

Girl Theft Auto was the funniest one, IMO.

05/01/2008 08:25:00 PM

stevotheidiot

Tankhead cheat owned so god-damned much.

05/01/2008 08:08:00 PM

Pwnzerfaust

Spiderman and the Transformer remind me of this: http://www.ctrlaltdel-online.com/comic.php?d=20080430

05/01/2008 07:43:00 PM

fragg

OK, seriously. How many 'OMG how could you guys pick THAT one?!? DDR was ALREADY in the game!!! FUCK!!!!" posts do we really need? We get it. In fact, in all fairness, I was thinking the same thing but you know what? I didn't say anything because I knew 5,000 other people would. You'd think at some point the next person who was ABOUT to point it out would notice that several dozen people had already beaten him to and and just let it go. Obviously, you'd be wrong.

05/01/2008 07:19:00 PM

Jenna_Tullwortz

Davo: Yeah, I guess. Blackrifice: Yeah. I just post what makes ME laugh. If others find it funny, too then it's a bonus.

05/01/2008 07:13:00 PM

Jenna_Tullwortz

You guys take this way too seriously... this top 25 had some good laughs. Don't take offence to these spoofs, it's not like you guys made the game or something. My God, chill out.

05/01/2008 07:10:00 PM

Hiryuusou

have you guys even played GTA? you obviously don't know originality, this top 25 SUCKS!!!! just like the rest of them, i saw one with jack thompson and that was fucking hilarious! that definately should have been #1! whoever did that should have won. honestly, don't do another one of these contests if you can't pick proper winners!

05/01/2008 06:08:00 PM

darkheartsdie

The winner would be funny if it wasn't for the fact THEY FUCKING HAD THAT IN SAN ANDREAS! Ok, so you didn't use the dance pad, but there was dancing mini-games if you went to clubs (and also car dancing too...) How about you guys give the prize to someone who was original...

05/01/2008 05:53:00 PM

Ubermensch

thanks for all the nice comments about #22. Personally I thought #25 was going to win because of how good it is. I laughed at 9,8, and 6. That's just my opinion though, which is like an ass because everyone has them except for assless Johnny who was the luckiest prisoner in Texas.

05/01/2008 05:45:00 PM

Justintoxicated

Wow. The winning joke was amusing, but SO FUCKING OBVIOUS. And am I crazy, or are #s 25-11 always funnier than 10-1?

05/01/2008 05:10:00 PM

homsar

Jenna, I agree. Mine and your craptions may never have won, but the winning craptions aren't always the funniest according to each person's sense of humor. The same goes for the PS contests, just on a smaller scale of judges and their opinions.

05/01/2008 04:53:00 PM

Blackrifice

#3 was damn good

05/01/2008 04:35:00 PM

froley

Why can't we vote for these? The descisions for first place seem random at best...

05/01/2008 04:00:00 PM

Firecrotch

Girl Theft Auto made me laugh. Also loved the puppy cannon. Worst one was the one that won.

05/01/2008 03:54:00 PM

Smell-the-glove

@Mars Ditto.

05/01/2008 03:54:00 PM

MichaelFurlong

Girl Theft Auto was my favorite

05/01/2008 03:46:00 PM

D_Mars

you're so crazy and out there Jenna

05/01/2008 03:27:00 PM

davo

Oh yeah. The GTA SQ and the puppy throwing thing was pretty goddamn funny, too..

05/01/2008 03:21:00 PM

Jenna_Tullwortz

..."The photo captions consistently have the funniest one picked,..." I SERIOUSLY have to disagree with that statement. There are plenty of others funnier than the ones I post but they're usually below mine. Oh well, I guess I just have a whacked sense of humor.

05/01/2008 03:18:00 PM

Jenna_Tullwortz

PS puppy throwing should have one, its the funniest thing i've seen all week

05/01/2008 03:02:00 PM

giantcowofdoom

I think some one brought this up last week, and i would like to second the idea, I really wish they would let the fans vote for this, the way the do with the photo captions. The photo captions consistently have the funniest one picked, where as whoever judges these contests seems to have very different qualifications for humor than the readers of this site. Luciferific is correct.

05/01/2008 03:02:00 PM

giantcowofdoom

I liked the puppy throwing.

05/01/2008 02:46:00 PM

Davita_Cuttita

I agree that it's dumb the DDR photoshop won; its IN THE GAME.

05/01/2008 02:01:00 PM

Rufa

HyperGlavin's was the best by a long shot. The winner barely warranted a smile even.

05/01/2008 01:48:00 PM

shishkabob3787

No, yours followed the theme of the contest perfectly and it freakin rocked. Definately should have been #1. Modding community, take heed.

05/01/2008 01:43:00 PM

Bishopwhitet

Thanks for the compliments, guys. I can see how my entry didn't win, though, since it was really just a comic that was loosely connected to the theme by a logo in the top corner. The winning entries actually put some effort into theirs and had some funny stuff as well.

05/01/2008 01:03:00 PM

HyperGlavin

I really don't like whoever judges these - the better ones get pushed in the back and the top 5 are usually lame. Plus the #1 IS in the fucking game - you go to a dance club and play it, so it isn't even a rejected idea, not to mention not as clever as some others

05/01/2008 12:53:00 PM

luciferific

I love how the first puppy thrown escapes unharmed.

05/01/2008 12:37:00 PM

zug

Oops, I meant an SPCA car. Dang Animal Planet cops...

05/01/2008 12:17:00 PM

Blackrifice

I like how the first puppy knocked the guy out and the second puppy blew up a police car. Man's best friend rocks!

05/01/2008 12:15:00 PM

Blackrifice

17, 9, and 23 are genius. I personally think 17 should have won.

05/01/2008 12:10:00 PM

tonyro19

would have been nice with some guitar hero references, but meh... can't have everything I suppose.

05/01/2008 12:06:00 PM

Mark

There was already a goddamn DDR mission in the last GTA. Maybe I should've submitted a photoshop putting hookers in the game?

05/01/2008 11:54:00 AM

Miko

I know, I know, that was grammatically incorrent...but I don't care, I'm busy playing GTA 4.

05/01/2008 11:53:00 AM

Zephyr97

I doubt half of these didn't even play any of the games.

05/01/2008 11:52:00 AM

Zephyr97

Girl Theft Auto was my favorite. If I had any photoshop skills I would entered something along the lines of "Trapped Behind Grandma Who's Driving 8 M.P.H. and Trying To Figure Out How To Dial Out On Her Cellphone While You're Trying To Evade All The Shit a 6 Star Wanted Level Throws At You." Obviously I'd have to streamline the title quite a bit but actually having a PHOTO should help with that. Oh well. It probably would have sucked anyway.

05/01/2008 11:47:00 AM

Jenna_Tullwortz

#3 is simply the greatest picture ever.

05/01/2008 11:45:00 AM

MChau723

6 had me laughing out loud. I'd love to play "Legal Purchase Auto"!

05/01/2008 11:11:00 AM

StickManJr

THESE AREN'T EVEN FROM GTA4!!!! CRACKED SUCKS THE BIGGEST NUTS IN HISTORY

05/01/2008 10:52:00 AM

Tenacious_B

I will never try to submit anything again. I didn't even get on the fucking list. Ughh... It's like they choose pics at random. There are so many better ones. Some of these are great though.

05/01/2008 10:50:00 AM

Tenacious_B

22 and 15 had me dying. Great job guys.

05/01/2008 10:20:00 AM

nemesis

yeah just about to say the exact same thing, the puppies should have won

05/01/2008 09:54:00 AM

Huntzie

I was about to say the same thing. the puppies as weapons is by far the funniest

05/01/2008 09:49:00 AM

Nukewhales

Dancing is stupid, i liked the exploding puppies better. It was nicely drawn too.

05/01/2008 09:47:00 AM

jcdent

DDR has already been in Grand Theft Auto in various forms.

05/01/2008 09:38:00 AM

Synskin

2, 7, 17. Favs.

05/01/2008 09:04:00 AM

EcricircE

Exploding puppies? Awesome! Now, bye-bye all, I'm off to change the grenade models in my PC copy of San Andreas to puppies.

05/01/2008 08:56:00 AM

Bujold

puppies should have been no. 1, even if it was only a storyboard. just sayin'.

05/01/2008 08:18:00 AM

brknlocket79

My favorites were 13 and 2, to be honest.

05/01/2008 08:04:00 AM

mrnoodle

Girl Theft Auto is by far the best one. My hat is off to you, themikeflynn. Hilarious.

05/01/2008 08:00:00 AM

Matthewsaurus

I love that the winning idea was in San Andreas.

05/01/2008 07:59:00 AM

mc248

Gee I wish I had mad skills like these people.

05/01/2008 07:59:00 AM

chiemilin

Girl Theft Auto- classic.

05/01/2008 07:44:00 AM

steveysteve

um... there was already a DDR of sorts in GTA:SA... just go to a club.... sorry.. .they been there done that!

05/01/2008 07:44:00 AM

fuzzymuffins

#3 was hilarious

05/01/2008 07:43:00 AM

xathish

Hey JayleBayt, thanks for the props. I had more fun making the Grand Theft Emo. I thought it might've had a chance, but whatever, I'll kick more ass next time. *Sound of ass being kicked*

05/01/2008 07:38:00 AM

Bishopwhitet

#6-10 were all great.

05/01/2008 07:31:00 AM

JanniR

sorry but 3 is the funniest by a fucking MILE

05/01/2008 07:29:00 AM

noodlepie54

dre prostate exam should've won it.

05/01/2008 07:22:00 AM

col_p

Took me a minute to even see the joke in it, but the douche on the Segway was by far my favorite.

05/01/2008 07:15:00 AM

wittynickname

#3 was the best. I'd utilize the exploding puppies.

05/01/2008 07:11:00 AM

Onodera

I like how the dance dance revolution won yet in san andreas there was a mission where you had to, wait for it...dance your way into a party by matching keys flying towards you. What does that sound like to you?

05/01/2008 07:00:00 AM

ApocalypseWhen

Nice work. #16 and 22 made me snort.

05/01/2008 06:26:00 AM

YogaChoga

Seriously though, quite a few of these had me laughing out loud, and even more of them look like they could have been considered for the game. Nice work all!

05/01/2008 06:26:00 AM

Demolitionist

-Statement claiming nothing listed here is even remotely funny -Argument that none of the contests are ever funny, but continue to read every single one that comes out -Berating comments aimed at Cracked judges because the one I thought was funny didn't win -If I made an entry, threaten to never submit an entry again because I didn't win, but continue to do so anyway

05/01/2008 06:25:00 AM

Demolitionist

That Yoga one sounds a little too realistic...like some jerk exec might actually try and push that through into a game. Scary! But I would definitely play GTA4 with extra fervor if Spiderman was involved!

05/01/2008 06:01:00 AM

fragg

I was gonna complain about the judging, but then I saw that I came in fourth so obviously they have some idea of what they are doing.

05/01/2008 05:52:00 AM

SamLowery

DS threat was hilarious.

05/01/2008 05:50:00 AM

Larwick

Once again you douchebags don't know what funny is. Bishop Whitet's Grand Theft Mulatto shoud've won hands down.

05/01/2008 05:47:00 AM

JayleBayt

Man, this is hillarious. Although, there were funnier ones than first place. Still, very funny.

05/01/2008 05:47:00 AM

dexaroni

i cant do this any better but still i have to say...meh. i'm not hating but the last one was alot funnier. and i love gta4. this could have been better.

05/01/2008 05:44:00 AM

Gemineye870530